Healing process
by Belladonna-Isabella
Summary: This is a response to an lj prompt. What if, when Erik was flung around by Shaw, trying to find an opening that Charles could exploit, was hurt pretty bad?How do they move on from there. Warnings: AU, slash.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing.

**A/N:** This is a response to an lj prompt about Erik being hurt as Shaw flung him to the pipes. It will be **Charles/Erik** and of course **AU**.

Now** beta-ed **by** Arcana Major**

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><p><strong>.<strong>

**oOo**

**.**

Charles struggled against the intense pounding in his head. The remnants of Shaw's dying conscience fading slowly. He could really have used some rest after such an intense experience. He had never felt someone die, especially in such an excruciating manner. However, there was no time to even think about that. So he managed with some effort to get to his feet and drag himself to the beach where the rest of his fellow mutants were fighting.

His arrival coincided with Erik's who was, effortlessly, levitating the dead body of his nemesis. Normally he would have felt him before seeing him but that helmet had cut him off.

No, _Erik_ had cut him off.

Admitting that to himself made his heart tighten in his chest. He was afraid. Not of Erik, because he believed that the magnetokinetic would never intentionally hurt him. He was terrified of what that disconnection between them may mean and where it could lead.

Upon the sight of their dead leader; Angel, Azazel and Riptide stopped fighting, looking up at Erik with apprehension and a tinge of awe. Their expressions were partially mirrored by the rest of his own team. Although, Charles suspected his own held nothing but sorrow.

Letting the body drop, Erik started talking about brotherhood and union between mutants against humans.

But Charles was only listening in part, his own heartbeat deafening to his ears. He had expected something like this would happen. But he had clung to the hope that he could get through to Erik, like a drowning man to a life-preserver. The tightening in his chest increasing as anxiety seized him.

He observed the man in front of him move with slight, deliberate moves; his voice tight, probably due to the intensity of the situation. Erik's eyes were cold, colder than he had ever seen them, but there was also something else in them that Charles could not quite place.

"The real enemy is out there. I feel their guns moving in the water."

_Please don't. Don't do this Erik!_

He tried desperately to project the thought to his friend but found nothing. As if Erik was a void. An absence.

"...they are running scared my fellow mutants." Erik motioned towards the ships, "Go ahead Charles, tell me I am wrong."

That brought Charles to full attention. He eyed his friend carefully before bringing his fingers to his temple, trying to ascertain if Erik was indeed right and fearing that he was.

It took no effort to verify hisstatement. And Erik, who had been studying him carefully, picked up the sudden widening of his eyes as confirmation. As he nodded, Charles felt everyone's fear flare. Moira, who had been following him, turned on her heels and run towards the wreckage of their plane, no doubt to try and contact the ships.

But the missiles were released.

Everyone stared in fear as the airborne weapons quickly closed the distance between the ships and the island.

Then Erik raised his hand.

One by one the missiles froze in the air. Suspended as if by invisible strings.

It was to be expected that Erik would be able to do that after lifting the submarine but everyone let out a breath of relief. Not Charles though. He was too anxious now, he knew that this would be the most defining moment of his life. Everything depended on Erik's next step. Would he disable the missiles or would he retaliate?

As his eyes roamed the face of his friend, Charles noted the tightness of his lips. Suddenly Erik's effort to maintain control of the missiles was obvious in his face. The telepath now noticed that the magnetokinetic's hand was clutching his side.

"Erik are-" he begun but was cut off as he found himself gazing into his friend's eyes and something clicked in his mind, a recognition. What he had seen in Erik's eyes was pain, pain that he had tried to hide.

_If it wasn't for that blasted helmet-_

His thoughts were interrupted as an explosion was heard and the wave knocked him down and a few feet away. Immediately he searched mentally for the others and was relieved to find all of them, even Moira who had just returned to their side, safe but anxious. Their anxiety seeped into him and scurrying to his feet he searched for the one he couldn't reach.

His anxiety escalated to panic as he saw Erik on his knees, one hand supporting him, the other keeping the rest of the missiles in place. He hurried back to his side and with horror he saw blood coming from his friend's mouth.

Erik's eyes were slightly unfocused as they found his. Pain was etched on every line of his face.

"Charles," he spoke, the strain becoming evident from the tightness of his voice, "You have to leave. I don't know how much longer I can keep them in place."

Frantically, Charles shook his head as soon as the first words left his friend's mouth.

"No! Erik. No!" he almost yelled.

Erik coughed, blood spraying on the sand.

The missiles moved a little forward.

"Azazel! Please, can you help us?" Charles's desperation took control of him as he turned to the devil-like mutant. Tears pooling into his pleading eyes.

Hesitantly the man nodded. Relief washing over Charles, he motioned to the others to come to him. Quickly the linked hands. Charles grabbing Erik's before taking Azazel's.

_Take us to a hospital._

He whispered into the teleporter's mind, not sure if he was implanting a suggestion or simply asking.

It must have been the latter since, he received a nod of agreement.

Then, they were gone.

The missiles, now released from their invisible hold, devastated the island.

**.**

**oOoTBCoOo**

**.**

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><p><strong>Review!<strong>


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: **I still own nothing**.**

**A/N:** Thank you for the support. It means the world to me that you have liked the story and the feedback made me want to get the next chapter out sooner. So, despite my exams I have managed to write the second chapter.

Now** beta-ed **by** Arcana Major**

* * *

><p><strong>.<strong>

**oOo**

**.**

Barely a second after their departure from the beach, they appeared in a dimly lit passageway.

"Where are we?" Sean whispered.

"In some sort of utility tunnels I assume," Hank replied.

"This must be a hospital where Azazel felt safe enough to take us," Charles said as he helped Erik on his feet, not paying real attention to the teleporter's affirmative nod. His entire focus was on the magnetokinetic, whose breathing was now labored.

"You should sit down. You shouldn't be moving so much," he told him.

Erik's lips were a thin line, an expression that Charles had come to recognize as determination blended with stubbornness. It was obvious that Erik regretted his moment of weakness back at the beach and seemed now determined to hide his real condition.

_Ever the fighter._

He looked at Charles, moving to stand in front of him. His movements seemed restrained, suspiciously so. His hardened expression softened as he saw the depth of concern the telepath's eyes revealed.

"Charles I-"he started saying but was cut off.

"What? You are fine? You were coughing blood just a moment ago." Charles felt anger rising in him. But as it had come, it dissipated as he saw how pale Erik was and he noticed a faint tremble of his hands.

"We should get you to a doctor quickly," the telepath said in a determined tone as he made a move to wrap his hand around his friend's waist to offer him support. Half way through the movement he felt Erik's body shake, as a new fit of coughing overwhelmed him. Then he felt the magnetokinetic relax completely as he crumpled to the floor, almost dragging Charles with him.

Panicked, Charles lowered him to the floor as gently as he could.

"Erik! Erik!" his hands touched the other man's shoulders, shaking him slightly.

The others whispered in concern as Hank kneeled by Erik and checked his pulse.

"His pulse is weak and his breathing uneven. We should get him to a doctor soon, he may be going into shock," a note of urgency was evident in his voice.

"I'll go," Raven said as she shifted to her usual human form, before taking off in a hurry, followed by Moira.

Charles nodded, fear etched on his face. He was certain now that his friend had sustained internal injuries, maybe even internal bleeding, by being thrown around by Shaw.

With shaking hands, he reached out and carefully removed Shaw's helmet from his friend's head.

As soon as the barrier between his mind and Erik's was removed, all his senses were overwhelmed by pain. The helmet fell from his hands with a mild clang.

A gasp left the telepath's lips.

The feeling was so intense and unexpected that it broke through his usual mental barriers. For a moment Erik's pain was his own. Every neural passageway was filled with it. Then, his mind reacted to protect itself and pushed the pain behind the mental walls. Charles took a deep breath trying to shake off the effect.

_How was he able to stand, being in such pain?_

"Professor!"

"Professor?"

"Professor? Are you okay?"

The rest of the team were asking. He nodded.

"He must be bleeding internally," Hank confirmed Charles's suspicions. The younger man was obviously trying to sound as cold and scientific as he could in order to reign in his own anxiety and concern. Both of them knew the implications of Erik's condition and how potentially dangerous it could be.

"Shouldn't we hurry then?" Alex enquired as he came closer.

Hank shook his head. "We shouldn't move him."

"Raven is on her way," Charles informed them.

His hand caressed lightly Erik's hair. It was a comforting gesture he hoped would reach his friend. He could attempt to do more, take away his pain but he felt it was unwise. Charles feared that by doing something like that he could cause problems with Erik's treatment and that wasn't a risk he was willing to take.

_I am sorry my friend. Please...just bear with it a little longer._

"Damn it!" he muttered under his breath. Concern overlapping with anger. Anger targeted at himself for being unable to do anything and at Erik for being so reckless with himself.

Erik's breathing was now even more strenuous. His skin felt colder too, Charles noted as he touched his forehead.

Everyone heard the echoes of footsteps and a faint clinging sound as Raven came into view, with four people and Moira in tow. Two men and a woman.

"We're here," Moira confirmed as they reached them.

One man was in his early forties, fit, with light brown hair and dark brown eyes. The other one was older, in his mid fifties, gray hair and medium build. The woman, who was pushing a gurney, was younger with brown hair tied up, fair skinned and small build. As their clothes indicated, the men were doctors while the woman was probably a nurse.

For a moment Charles admired the tenacity of Moira and his sister to actually persuade two doctors to follow them and briefly wandered how they had managed it.

If the newly arrived people wondered at the circumstances or if they were taken aback by Hank's appearance, they didn't show anything besides a widening of their eyes. They took in the situation as professionals and immediately focused on the unconscious man that lay on the floor.

The two men knelt by his sides, pushing aside Charles and Hank, who gave them space to do their job but kept close, anxious to see.

"What happened?" the older man asked as he checked for a pulse.

"He was in a fight. Got tossed around a lot," Charles voice came out strained.

"We fear he may be bleeding internally," Hank informed.

The doctor's face darkened as he nodded. "How long has he been unconscious?"

The other man reached for the zipper of Erik's uniform as he put on his stethoscope.

"About 3 minutes," Hank provided.

"Did you move him?"

"No but-"Charles started saying but was cut off by the younger doctor.

"Doctor Martin! Look at this."

There was urgency in his tone and as Charles followed his gaze he saw what had instilled the tone in the doctor's voice.

There was a big bruise spreading in Erik's lower sternum.

"He is bleeding internally, his pulse is thready, he is hypothermic and tachycardic and his breath sounds are uneven," the younger doctor provided.

The older doctor, gave a short nod of agreement, "He is going into shock."

Then he turned to the nurse, "Mary bring the stretcher, we have to rush him to the ER."

As they moved Erik to the gurney Charles looked at his friend's colourless face in horror.

"He is going into cardiac arrest!" He yelled as he climbed on Erik and started giving him CPR.

"Move Jones! We're losing him!" he commanded the other man who reacted immediately and begun to push the gurney.

Charles felt like he had been frozen to the core. What he was feeling was beyond panic, a fear so all consuming that could swallow him whole. Erik was in a worse condition than he had thought.

_Cardiac arrest._

_That is...clinical death._

_Erik could die..._

He felt his breath catch in his throat. He wanted to scream.

_This wasn't supposed to happen!_

Charles was suffocating, his throat burning and he felt his eyes water.

"Charles," Raven's soft voice shook him from his daze. She looked upset and he could see tears in her eyes. Tears she refused to let fall.

He knew Raven cared about Erik as well. They were all a family now.

"He'll be all right," she whispered softly as she drew him in an embrace.

Charles briefly wondered when his sister had become this strong young woman that was comforting him now.

"We should follow them," Moira said.

Both siblings nodded their agreement and started towards the route Raven had taken earlier.

"Ah, I-" Hank muttered, "go on, I will follow you later."

Charles steps were steady as he moved, followed by the rest of his team. He had chosen once again to embrace hope. A hope that was fueled by the fact that he could still feel, however vaguely and dampened by the pain, the presence of his friend's mind.

_Erik! I'm here. I am by your side. Please hold on!_

**.**

**oOoTBCoOo**

**.**

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><p><em>Review!<em>


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer:** I still own nothing.

**A/N:** Again I beg forgiveness for any medical inaccuracies. A million thanks to those who have reviewed, favorite or put this story on alert. I am hoping to hear your opinion on this chapter as well. The feedback has been a great boost to my muse and I post much sooner than I had initially planned (a chapter a week).

Now** beta-ed **by** Arcana Major**

* * *

><p><strong>.<strong>

**oOo**

**.**

The worst part of it all was the waiting. Not knowing what was going on and simply sitting in one of the uncomfortable chairs of the waiting room, fearing the worst and hoping for the best.

Raven hadn't seen her brother so out of it before. He had sat down and not moved from the moment they had gotten there. She had assumed that he was reaching for Erik with his mind, taking whatever assurance he could that the other man was alive. To everything else, Charles was oblivious.

Even when the nurse had come to get Erik's information, Charles hadn't reacted. He hadn't even looked up. Thankfully Moira had been able and willing to fill out the necessary documents. Raven was grateful to her for her clear-headedness and determination. It had been Moira that had gotten both doctors to come with her, using a very authoritative tone, she had stared them down and made them comply. Briefly the shapeshifter had wondered if that was something that had come from the CIA training. In any case she couldn't help but admire the older woman.

As they all sat around, near one another, Raven, in her usual blonde disguise, let her eyes wonder to the rest of their group. Hank had come back wearing a hood and gloves, trying to hide his animalistic characteristics and his blue fur. Alex sat opposite her and was looking at the floor, a solemn expression on his face. Sean was now seated but would get up at intervals and pace up and down. Moira was sitting near Charles, hands crossed in front of her, her left index finger gently tapping her right arm.

Azazel, Riptide and Angel had disappeared but nobody had noticed or seemed to particularly care about their departure. Not with what was going on and the anxiety over Erik.

Her eyes fell again on her brother. Charles was completely still, head supported by his right hand and a faraway gaze. His eyes were pools of worry and concentration. Raven was worried by this. She had suspected that he had become very close to Erik, especially given the fact that they had known each other for such a short time, but this reaction was too intense. She could literally feel concern and anxiety radiate from Charles's stiff posture.

_Charles, could you be...?_

Before the thought even had the opportunity to form in her mind, she was pulled back to reality as a nurse approached them. She took a brief look at the chart she had with her before addressing them.

"Family and friends of Erik Lensherr?" she asked.

That attracted everyone's attention, even Charles's.

"Yes," he looked at her.

"He's is still in surgery and has suffered severe blood loss. He will need a transfusion."

The news brought new agitation in the group.

"Does any of you have O blood type or B-?"the woman enquired.

Silence reigned for a moment as they looked at each other. Then a hesitant hand was raised.

"I do. My blood type is O."

Suddenly everyone's focus shifted to Sean, who had uttered those words with a hint of timidity and determination.

As the nurse nodded, the others smiled at the young man. Alex even squeezed his shoulder, while Charles gave him a grateful look.

She looked at Sean,"Very well mister...?"

"Cassidy."

"Ok, you will have to come with me." she said almost absent-mindedly as she scribbled down something on the chart.

"Oh, and if there is anyone else willing to donate blood...the hospital is always in need of blood."

"Yes of course." Moira spoke as the others nodded their agreement eagerly.

"Follow me then."

Charles made a move to follow them but was stopped on his heals by Moira's penetrating gaze.

"No, not you, "she told him in a tone that left no room for disagreement. Charles looked at her in surprise.

"You have been through a lot today. Last thing we need is for you to faint from blood loss," she explained in a tone that Raven recognized. She had used it herself when Charles was being overly excited or reckless. It was a blend between motherly and sisterly.

Charles needed reminding sometimes that helping others is nice and good but you have to take care of yourself first in order to be in a position to help others. Raven loved that side of him, the altruism and the hope. The tendency to see the best in others and ignore the rest. But it worried her as well. In a sense it was Charles's greatest strength and weakness. That kind of open-heartedness, the readiness to embrace the entire world, could break him if he was ever betrayed. Which was why Raven was determined to protect him from himself if need be and she was happy to find an ally in Moira.

"Moira is right Charles, you shouldn't overexert yourself," as she spoke tenderly to her brother, letting her concern for him reach him, she gently touched his hand. "Sit here with Hank and we will be back soon."

He hesitated for a moment.

"Yes. Ok," he said tiredly.

That earned him a smile from both women.

"Shall we?" the nurse cut in, a hint of impatience coloring her voice.

As they turned and left, Charles returned to his seat. Hank let out a sigh before moving to the seat next to the older man.

"Professor..." his voice trailed away as he tried to find the right words.

"Professor, Erik will be okay. He is very resilient."

"I know...I know firsthand all he has gone through and still survived, despite all the odds," Charles said looking at his hands. His voice cracking a bit with emotion.

_I know. I just can't help thinking about it._

What Charles couldn't put into words was the weird feeling he had had before the battle. He had spent last night and turning, trying to come to terms with Erik's declaration about killing Shaw. He had expected something to happen, though he hadn't known precisely what. Something that would put a dent in his and Erik's relationship. Charles had suspected that revenge would not be what Erik imagined and feared how that would affect his friend. It was entirely possible that Erik would close himself off and even go to extremes. Then Charles would lose him. But losing him like that, though it would hurt, was nothing compared to the thought of Erik dying.

The thought of losing Erik tore at his heart. The relationship that bound them together was more than the immediate connection they had established. They complimented each other, respected each other and disagreed with each other. Charles had never felt happier than those days they had spent together on those recruitment missions. They were best friends. Yet somehow, the term didn't seem to do justice to what existed between them. He really couldn't specify the reason his feelings were so strong when it came to the magnetokinetic.

He had been surprised and now was a little concerned by this realization. If Azazel hadn't immediately agreed to help them off the island, the telepath wasn't sure how he would have reacted. Never before had he been so glad for the self control he had developed so diligently throughout the years. But it appeared that Erik's wellbeing was sufficient reason to push him as far as being tempted to break his own rules.

_I need him._

The thought came to the surface unexpectedly. Charles felt himself blink in surprise. It was true though. Somewhere, somehow in the past months Erik had become indispensable. The more he had gotten to know him, the more entranced by the man he became. Erik was complex and exciting and he was like air to Charles.

Necessary.

Once again, seeking assurance he dived into his friends mind. He couldn't get a specific read but at least he was still there. A weak presence. But at least Erik was still there.

Hank didn't make another effort to speak and the two men sat in silence, waiting for the rest of the team to return and for news on Erik's condition.

**.**

**oOo**

**.**

Two hours passed since Erik was ushered to the OR.

The wait was gnawing at everyone's nerves. Raven had fallen asleep on Hank's shoulder. The intensity of the day and the sheer physical exhaustion, coupled with blood loss, was taking its toll.

Moira was on her third coffee as Alex and Sean returned from the cafeteria and handed a cup filled with water to Charles.

"Professor, we thought you could use some," Alex said.

Charles took it, giving the boys a smile but was distracted as the doctor walked in the room.

Everyone's focus was immediately on him.

Charles got up. Moira moved to his side.

"Your friend is now stable. He has some contusions to the upper body, some cracked ribs and a broken one. His most severe injury was a result of the broken rib, that had nicked his lung and heart."

"B-but now he's ok? He is going to be ok?" Raven and Charles asked at the same time, hopeful and desperate to be assured that the worst was over.

The doctor gave them a smile in understanding. "We will keep him for a 48 hour observation to be sure he doesn't start bleeding internally again. Barring any complications he will be able to leave the hospital in a week."

"However," assumed his most serious posture and tone, "his injury was severe and we almost lost him twice at the table. These kind of injuries require an extensive period of recuperation. He will be on antibiotics and painkillers for at least a month and he will have to be very careful not to overexert himself."

_It would be catastrophic if the tear in his heart reopens._

Charles blanched a bit at the thought he heard from the doctor.

"Don't worry, we will make sure he takes it easy," the telepath assured him. For the first time since the battle with Shaw he let himself smile earnestly.

As the doctor left them, Charles noticed smiles and hugs going all around the team and quickly he felt enveloped in one himself.

"You see Charles, he is going to be okay," Raven assured him.

"Yeah," he replied, leaning in the hug.

It seemed like ages had passed since he had last breathed freely. He took a deep breath and let himself relax.

That was the last thing he knew as he felt himself fall, enveloped by impenetrable darkness.

Voices were calling out to him.

Then nothing.

**.**

**oOoTBCoOo**

**.**

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><p><strong>What do you think? Review and tell me. Any suggestions welcome.<strong>


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: **Nope, I still own nothing.

**A/N:** You are amazing! Thank you so much for the support and the feedback. I was so excited that I got this done much earlier than I had expected. Hope that you will enjoy it.

Now** beta-ed **by** ArcanaMajor**

* * *

><p>.<p>

**oOo**

.

Blue eyes fluttered open as Charles attempted to adjust to the sudden return to consciousness. Slowly taking in the white room, soft light emanating from a lamp beside the bed; illuminating an empty chair that seemed to be maintaining a vigil beside his bed, as well as a small closet on the opposite wall.

With dismay he realized he was wearing one of those ghastly hospital gowns and that there was an IV drip attached to his arm.

As he tried to sit up, he felt a little dizzy and halted his movement. Outside the window, it was dark.

_How long was I unconscious?_

He felt tired and the bed was more than inviting but a thought struck him.

_Erik!_

He fumbled with the sheets, trying to release himself and got up. The quick movement made him wobble, as he reached out and grabbed the chair, trying to steady himself.

With a few tentative steps he reached the closet and opened it. He was pleasantly surprised to find newly bought pants, shirt and shoes. He took them and placed them on the chair. Sparing a look towards the door to make sure it was closed, he pulled the gown off and started dressing. First the pants, then the shirt.

A soft creaking was heard.

"Where exactly do you think you are going?" The exasperated voice of Raven filled the small hospital room. She was standing, almost glaring at him, at the opening of the door.

Charles looked up guiltily as he finished buttoning up his shirt.

"Em...it's not what you think?" he tried. Sounding like a child that had been caught causing mischief.

"Oh...So, you're not going to see Erik?" his adopted sister asked, eyebrows raised.

"Okay, maybe it is what you think," Charles answered and made a move towards her and the door.

Understanding his intention, she stepped in front of him.

"Oh no mister. Don't start this with me. You are not going to see Erik now. The doctor said that you had to stay in bed for at least a day," while she spoke, her eyes were scanning Charles's face.

"Raven, I assure you, I am feeling fine."

"No, no. You are NOT fine. You fell unconscious in my arms and the doctor said that it is simply fatigue but that you have to rest and..." Her gaze fell on his hand. "Well at least you didn't get rid of your IV."

Charles smiled shyly at his sister.

"I wasn't going to."

His face took a saddened expression blended with longing," I just wanted to see him."

"Charles..." Raven took his hand in hers. "He is freshly out of surgery and you are a patient now as well. I don't think they would let you in."

Her eyes were warm and understanding.

"Oh yes they would," he whispered looking away from her.

He realized that he must not have spoken as quietly as he thought he had.

"Charles Francis Xavier!" she exclaimed. Part surprised, part exasperated at his stubbornness.

Charles rarely demonstrated directly that particular aspect of his personality. Usually he would hide it behind his machinations and his apparent serene demeanor but it was always there. The long years of living together with him had taught her that. Rare though it may be, when he was like this it was difficult to get through to him.

Taking a breath she moved them both towards the bed. Sitting side by side, his hand always in hers she looked deeply into his eyes before starting to speak.

"Look Charles. I know you are worried and that you want to see him to make sure he is okay. I get it!" She declared.

"But, as the doctor said, Erik has a long way before him if he is going to recover from his injuries and I don't think he is the kind of person to follow doctor's orders," Raven let out a sigh.

_And it appears he is not the only one._

"So, we will need you to keep him in line. He listens to you."

The telepath shot her an incredulous look.

"He does. Wasn't it you that persuaded him to come back. Come on Charles, you told me all about how he was about to walk away and yet he changed his mind," Raven insisted.

"So, in order for you to be able to help him you will have to take care of yourself first," She concluded.

Charles opened his mouth to speak but was cut off.

"Don't tell me you are fine. I know you well enough to see that the way you are filching every time I speak is the result of a headache. You need to rest."

He could see her eyes pleading.

_Please Charles. I was so worried for you when you collapsed._

He never liked making people worry for him. He felt guilty for making things harder on his sister. Surely she had been distressed for Erik and he had only added to it.

It was true he had a headache. He had had it ever since the events on the beach. At first it had been a sharp pain, now it was a dull ache, almost like a pulsating sensation.

The nod of agreement he gave to Raven made her smile.

"Okay then, get back into that gown and bed and I will get a nurse to give you some painkillers," she said lovingly squeezing his arm.

Releasing her hold on him, she moved towards the door but his voice stopped her.

"Raven, where are the others?" Charles enquired.

"They've found a hotel nearby and went there to get some rest. I insisted on staying, to be here when you woke up," she replied, the smile never leaving her face.

"But don't worry, Moira will be here soon to keep an eye on you," she hastened to assure him before leaving the room.

"I don't need-"

Charles tried to protest but she had already left.

Taking a deep breath he started the tedious task of undressing. Once he was back in his bed, lying comfortably on the pillows, Raven's words came back to him.

_He listens to you._

Charles had his doubts. Erik was too much his own man, too independent to listen to anyone. He had his opinions and ideals and stuck with them. Could Charles truly dissuade him from anything the magnetokinetic wanted to do?

He hadn't been able to stop Erik from killing Shaw. He wouldn't have been able to stop him from-

For a moment Charles flashed back at that moment on the beach where Erik had complete control over the missiles? What would he have done? Could Charles have stopped him if he chose to attack the ships? Would he have listened to him? The telepath was uncertain. It had been Erik's decision to put on that helmet. He had chosen to cut himself off from Charles. For one moment Erik had not trusted him.

And that hurt.

It hurt deeply.

**.**

**oOoTBCoOo**

**.**

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	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer:** I do not own.

**A/N:** I am surprised at myself at having this done so quickly. I blame you all for all your lovely feedback and encouragement. XD

Now** beta-ed **by** Arcana Major.**

* * *

><p><strong>.<strong>

**oOo**

**.**

Erik woke up feeling groggy and disoriented. A faint beeping sound reached his ears. Then came the pain.

That was something familiar. A sensation he had woken up to for as long as he could remember. Most of the time it was mental, the product of nightmares spun by real experiences. Today, it was purely physical. Pain was something he knew well. It had been a constant companion throughout his existence.

He had never shied away from it. Not after Shaw. Pain had become a friend to him. A reminder that he was still alive and that he had something he had to do. Whether it was physical or mental, he had been through intense pain before, enough to know how to tame it, up to a point.

That was how on the beach-

Ah, the beach. Now Erik remembered.

Shaw was dead.

A smile spread on his face and he begun laughing.

Shaw was no more.

He had killed him.

Then he noticed a movement, near his right hand. A second later he found himself staring in the blue sleepy eyes of Charles Xavier.

"Erik, you're awake," he muttered and gave him a bright smile that reached his eyes.

A sincere smile of joy.

The nod Erik gave him seemed to please him even more.

From the very first time he had met Charles, Erik had been captivated by his eyes. Radiant eyes that held so much hope, kindness and love. The telepath was determined to see good in others and to help them. Even Erik was no exception.

Often the magnetokinetic found himself wishing he could be what the other man wanted him to be. Because to disappoint Charles, who so readily accepted everyone, seemed like a grave sin, even in a sinner's eyes.

But he couldn't.

For the longest of times he had been bound by chains of hate; fueled by revenge. Everything he had done was to survive and reach his one goal, his one true ambition, Shaw.

He had seen Charles's eyes darken with disappointment and concern when he had expressed his intentions regarding the man that had killed his mother. He had known that that could be the turning point of their relationship, their friendship. Even Charles's acceptance must have limits, certain things even Charles couldn't ignore, Erik had mused at one point.

"Why are you here?" he asked with a hoarse voice.

The question seemed to surprise the other man. His smile lost some of its strength and his eyes darkened slightly.

Erik felt Charles's hand envelop his.

Now he was genuinely surprised.

Why was Charles still here, with him. After what he had done? After the helmet.

He had known well what it had meant to put on that helmet. He had intended to cut himself off from Charles. He had wanted to erect a wall between them because he knew that this was it. He had done something that Charles couldn't forgive. There was no going back after that.

"I am here because you are my friend and I care about you. Even if..." the telepath's voice trailed away.

Erik took a painful breath. He felt anger rising within him as he spoke, "Even if I killed someone in cold blood?"

Charles looked at him with disbelief before shaking his head, "No, that wasn't what I wanted to say."

"Then what Charles?" the mental bender almost demanded, trying to muster the strength to sit up but finding it very difficult.

"Even if you didn't want me here," came the other man's reply. His eyes downcast.

The magnetokinetic was at a loss, "Didn't want..."

_How could he think that I-_

There was something strange about all this, Erik realized. It was as if Charles was apprehensive of something, almost afraid. He had never seen him so reserved and cautious.

_Cautious._

That was it. Realization dawned on him.

Charles is actively trying to stay away from my mind.

This is because of that _verdammt_ helmet!

_Yet again I have disappointed him. I showed him that I didn't trust him._

"I am sorry Charles," Erik spoke softly, almost astonished at his own words as they left his lips.

"For what?" Yet again the telepath seemed surprised.

"For not being who you want me to be."

As he uttered those words, Erik's eyes were fixed on the ceiling of his, off-white room.

For a moment only the heart monitor's beeping could be heard.

"How do you know you're not?" Charles asked, a very soft expression on his face as he made eye contact. "How do you know you're not exactly as I want you to be?" He pressed.

Erik looked at him thoughtfully.

"You don't see yourself clearly my friend. I told you before, there is so much more to you than you know," The telepath continued. "As for Shaw...I cannot begrudge you that. Not, knowing what I know. Even if I regret it had to be this way."

"You could have let him go," Erik said.

"But I didn't," The telepath replied, shaking his head. "If I had, he could have killed you and that wasn't something I would want to happen."

With great concentration and sheer power of will, Erik moved the bed to get himself into an almost sitting position.

"Erik!" Charles protested.

The magnetokinetic ignored him and tried to shift into a more comfortable position before speaking again, "Where are we Charles?"

"New York Hospital. Azazel, Shaw's teleporter brought us here just after you so heroically urged us to leave you behind on that island," The telepath was trying to keep the anger from his voice but wasn't succeeding.

He was so angry at Erik for that. He appreciated greatly that the magnetokinetic was inclined to sacrifice himself for his fellow mutants but that was something he never wanted to experience again. How could Erik have thought that they would leave him behind, that _he_ would leave him behind.

"You were severely injured, bleeding internally. You have a few cracked ribs and a broken one that had nicked your left lung and heart," He explained as coolly as he could but still at times his voice shook as he remembered the moments he had spent in fear of losing his friend.

"You have been asleep for more than 12 hours, on and off due to the anesthesia and the fatigue," The telepath concluded, earning a nod from the man sitting in front of him.

This recounting didn't seem to bother Erik, he seemed uninterested in his own condition.

"When will I be able to get out of here?" He asked calmly.

"The doctor said it will be about a week before you can come home with us," Charles replied, a hint of hope in his eyes.

"Home...Could I really do that Charles?" Erik enquired, his voice a strange mix of emotions.

Even though Charles was a good person, he was not a saint, try though he might. Could he really return to the mansion? Did he want to? Did he have the right to seek out that peace that he had felt in the brief days he had spent there? The peace he had denied he wanted or needed?

Charles squeezed gently his hand, "You will always be welcome there Erik. It will be your home for as long as you want it to be."

"There are many things that separate us," The mentalbender stated.

"That may be, but I believe that there are far more that unite us," Charles countered.

"You know that my methods are very different from yours," Erik told him, looking straight into his eyes.

Charles stood his ground. He seemed determined, "I do. But Erik, I am hoping to find a middle ground."

A middle ground. Yet another of Charles's idealistic visions? When push came to shove could they really hold it together? They were two very different people. Different backgrounds, different experiences that had formed their views on life. Erik was the product of the hard reality and what it could inflict on people. Forged in pain, conflict and having largely experienced the worst of what the human race was capable of.

Charles on the other hand had been raised in privilege and though Erik suspected from few words here and there that it had been exactly idyllic, he had lived a much calmer life. He had had Raven by his side and though his ability must have caused him some problems, he had had someone to share them with. For many years he had been an observer of humanity, seeing the best and the worst in them but always through a filter. He had never experienced firsthand that darkness that dominated the hearts of some people. Allowing him the ability to theorize about peace and to hope.

_But those differences are what bind you two together._

A voice whispered in his mind, at first he thought it was his friend but he realized it was his own.

It was true. They had worked together well and they had succeeded. In a sense, Charles and he were like yin and yang. Two opposing forces that complemented each other. Necessary for one another.

"Please Erik, give us a chance," Charles's tone was almost pleading.

However, everything came down to one thing. Did Erik want to go back with Charles? Was that the kind of life he wanted?

Yes, he wanted Charles by his side.

He would feel so alone if the telepath ever left him.

The realization almost came too late.

_I almost lost him once, because I was afraid what it would mean if he turned his back on me._

_But am I so selfish as to possibly put Charles through the same thing again, make him accessory to murder? Like I did with Shaw?_

The thought of Charles's hands stained with blood made his heart constrict.

From the first moment he had met the telepath Erik had felt very protective of him, because he was something Erik was not. He was pure and kind and caring. And he had seemed like he genuinely cared about Erik, despite his darkness.

For so long Erik had been alone and seeing people like him readily accept him had been a gift. He had taken the risk and opened up to Charles and had gotten to know him. They had gotten close and Erik for the first time in many years had found a friend. No, more than a friend, an equal. And for a brief period of time he had been happy. But deep down Erik had been afraid of the connection he had so easily established with the other man.

There was that part of him that warned against attachments. Friends and family could be used against you. Shaw had taught him that particular lesson very well.

If you had no one to care for, or no one to care for you, there was no danger of them dying because of you. If you loved no one, then you wouldn't live in fear of losing them. Charles was important to Erik and that made him a liability. But though Erik had struggled, he had realized he was unable to resist him.

He would have walked away from that first moment in the CIA facility, after he had gotten what he had wanted. But Charles had intervened and Erik had let himself be persuaded. It was as if the telepath was his own personal magnet. So, since he was unable to break free of this attachment, Erik had made his decision to protect him. He wouldn't let Charles suffer because of him. He wouldn't let him get hurt.

Even if that meant protecting him from afar.

Or, protecting him from Erik himself.

So why was he now wavering?

For good or ill, Charles seemed to want him, to need him and for now that was enough.

Taking a breath, he reached a decision, "Okay Charles, let's give this a chance."

At the sight of the smile that bloomed on his friend's face and the joy that reflected in the man's eyes, Erik couldn't help but grin a bit himself. Reveling in the comfortable silence, they just sat there looking at each other; smiling.

Suddenly the door opened, a little abruptly. Tearing the attention of the two men, from one another, towards the woman that was standing at the opening.

"Charles!" came Moira's exasperated voice.

"H-hey Moira," the telepath replied, blushing slightly.

She looked angry.

"Raven told me you were not to leave your room until the doctor came to check on you!"

Charles gave half a laugh.

_You snuck out of your room?_

The thought was directly aimed at Charles and he must have perceived it because he turned towards his bedridden friend, a surprised expression on his face. He searched the Erik's eyes as if asking permission. The magnetokinetic gave him a slight nod.

_Y-yes. I wanted to check up on you_.

Erik looked amused for a moment and relieved, it felt familiar to have Charles speak to him this way.

Then what Moira had said caught up with him.

"Wait, why where you in a hospital room?" He demanded, concern evident in his voice.

"Because the Professor here overexerted himself and he continues to do so despite doctor's orders," Moira provided helpfully.

"I'm okay," Charles said, earning a glare from Moira, "Really."

"I'm not hearing any of it. I am taking you back to your room," She declared.

_Help me?_

Came Charles's playfully pleading voice in his head.

Erik shook his head before sending a thought to his friend.

_Oh no, I am with Moira on this one._

_Traitor!_

Charles's mock-glared at him as he let himself be led out of the room.

"It's good to see you are okay Erik," Moira said, sparing him a smile, as she half-dragged the errant professor by the hand.

_Go and rest Charles, we will have time to talk later._

That must have been the right thing to say since he could swear he felt relief coming from the telepath's mind.

**.**

**oOoTBCoOo**

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	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer:** I do not own.

**A/N:** Once again an enormous thank you to all the people that have supported this story and me. I am sorry for the delay but this chapter has been beta-ed by the wonderful **Arcana Major **and it should be easier on the eyes. The poll will close after the posting of the next chapter, so if you haven't voted, there is still time. Also, you will notice the change of the term 'metalbender' to 'magnetokinetic', I know it sounds strange but it is more accurate.

**Beta: Arcana Major**

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><p><strong>.<strong>

**oOo**

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The week passed, slowly but calmly.

Having been released just a day after he was admitted, Charles had made it clear that he intended to be by Erik's side until the magnetokinetic was cleared to leave the hospital and return home. He had proceeded to spend almost every waking hour in Erik's room; playing chess, talking or simply reading in a comfortable silence. By unspoken agreement, they avoided conversations which could lead to subjects they didn't yet feel comfortable discussing.

The others would come by occasionally, some more than others. Raven was a daily visitor, as was Moira. Sean would swing by accompanied by Alex but neither of them would stay for more than a few minutes. Erik had always made Sean feel nervous and that had only gotten worse due to the recent events, even Alex was a bit uneasy knowing that the magnetokinetic had killed a man. Hank would avoid daytime visits altogether, fearing that he would attract attention; stopping his visits completely once it had become clear that Erik was no longer in danger.

Erik found himself enjoying Raven's visits in particular. She would talk about Charles's childhood, about incidents with his telepathy or simply mischievous achievements of her brother's. Charles would protest and a kind of bickering would ensue. To Erik, who had been deprived of this kind of warmth and intimacy for so long, these kind of moments were both enjoyable and painful. As soon as his thoughts started to wander towards darker places, Charles would look at him and the darkness would dispel.

Charles was content during that week. Erik was a difficult patient, there was no doubt about that, three days after his hospitalization he had started making demands to be released. However, the two men seemed to have settled back into their usual relationship. It wasn't perfect, many things were still left unsaid but Charles was willing to put it aside for the simple fact that Erik was there, in front of him. There would come a time when they would have to talk but for the time being they were willing to take things slowly for now.

The outside world was abuzz with conflicting reports surrounding the events of the conflict between the American and Russian fleets that had resulted into both parties ordering a combined missile strike against an apparently empty beach. Diplomats were running around trying to make sense of the situation and alleviate the tensions that had arisen between Cuba and those two countries.

But whatever was going on in the world outside didn't seem to be of much concern to the mutants at present. They were happy to deny the existence of any world outside the hospital doors for the moment. Content for the time being in this semblance of peace, reluctant to open a can of worms they didn't feel confident they could handle right now.

No one from the CIA had bothered them, possibly thinking they were dead. Investigations could not be conducted on the island yet to ascertain the facts, due to the political heat and Moira had neglected to inform her superiors that she was still alive. So life seemed to continue in relative calm for the human and the band of mutants. At least, that was, until Moira dropped by the hospital, the afternoon before Erik was scheduled to be discharged.

**.**

**oOo**

**.**

As usual she opened the door to find both men present; sitting on Erik's bed, a chess board between them. Both of them focused on the game in front of them.

"Hello Moira," Charles greeted, not looking away from the board.

The telepath reach out and moved his queen, before saying "Check".

This game must have started some time ago, Moira noted as she saw an assortment of pieces having already been taken by both sides.

Erik withdrew his king from the reach of Charles' queen before looking at the man sitting opposite him and giving him a grin, "I am very determined to win this one Charles."

"Then you should try a little harder," the telepath replied with a mischievous expression.

Moira had resisted the urge to roll her eyes, before she approached them and sat down on an empty chair near them.

"I wanted to talk to you," she said.

"Of course Moira, what is it?" Charles asked absentmindedly.

Erik didn't make any indication he registered her presence. Though they had made some progress in the past few days, his dislike towards her hadn't completely disappeared. Moira wasn't bothered by that, she knew Erik had a lot of issues and with good reason.

"I 've decided to go back to the CIA," she stated.

Her statement had an immediate effect as both men turned to look at her, forgetting about their game. Charles simply looked surprised while Erik displayed a mix of surprise and suspicion.

"What brought this on Moira?" the telepath enquired.

"I understand that you have been preoccupied the past few days but there are things that must be done, sooner rather than later," her tone remained professional as she spoke.

"Things like what?" Erik asked, narrowed blue eyes studying her carefully.

"The CIA knows about you and from the accounts of the events they may have already made the connection between mutants and the events that took place at the beach. Even if they haven't yet initiated a full investigation, it won't be long before the they do. If that happens, it'll be in our best interests to have someone on the inside could that can sidetrack it," Moira explained.

Erik seemed thoughtful, Charles however shook his head.

"That may not be a good idea," he said, "Not that I don't agree, that eventually something will have to be done about this but how would you explain your survival?"

"Are you certain about this Moira? Not that I don't agree, eventually something will have to be done about this but it may not be the best idea. But this means you would be choosing sides between us and the government. You could be abandoning everything you have worked for, "Charles asked, looking straight into her eyes.

"I want to help you Charles, all of you," said Moira her face set, "they may not act immediately if they think that you have all been killed but they know now and they will start looking. You have said it yourself that the mutations have accelerated, with every new generation there will be a larger number of mutants born."

"She is right Charles," Erik stated, earning a surprised look from Moira.

The telepath turned to look at his friend.

_'I know she is, but we shouldn't involve her.'_

The magnetokineticgave him a questioning look , _'What could you do? Erase her memories?'_

Charles remained silent.

_'You could?' _surprise evident in Erik's voice.

_'Yes,' _the telepath almost sounded apprehensive as he replied.

Erik was uncertain if he should feel fear or awe in light of this revelation. He had known Charles was powerful, much more so than Emma Frost, but he hadn't suspected that he could exert that much power over the mind. His eyes lit up in admiration as he looked at Charles as if it was the first time he was truly seeing him.

_'Stop that,' _came the embarrassed voice of his telepathic friend. At least the apprehension was gone and a hint of relief floated through their connection.

Of course Charles would be reluctant to reveal that part of himself, to Erik or to anyone else. Perhaps to Erik even more, especially after the insistence of the magnetokinetic for the telepath to stay out of his mind. The helmet incident had aggravated the situation and even though Erik tried to encourage Charles to use his abilities with him, he didn't feel completely at ease with it and the telepath could have felt it.

_'I am sorry Charles, I just never realized that-'_

_'That my abilities were so powerful.'_

There was a certain bitterness in those words and Erik really wanted to ask why, but he knew now was not a good time.

Charles just shrugged it off, as if it was not important, before speaking again, _'I do not like using that part of my abilities but..."_

_'Then don't, it is her decision," _the magnetokinetic replied.

_'She could have been killed because of us."_

_'It is still her choice, you shouldn't deny her that,'_ Erik told his friend.

_'But-'_

_'Look Charles, I know you and I know that you will regret doing this, so don't. We will find another way,' _the magnetokinetic stated, trying to sound as certain as he could.

He really understood that it would cost Charles if he were to lose Moira like that and just as much as the telepath wanted to protect Moira, Erik wanted to protect Charles even more. The fact that the telepath would have to, potentially, use this particular ability against other people soon was something that would be necessary and unavoidable. He could easily see himself insisting on it if it was to protect his people from everyone who tried to harm them.

_'I know,'_ the telepath whispered in his mind and Erik realized that he must have been projecting his thoughts unwittingly as he got caught up in them.

_'We can do this Charles, together,'_ the magnetokinetic's voice was filled with confidence.

There was a pause.

_'Thank you Erik,'_ Charles let his relief wash over the other man.

It was what he needed to hear, this way it became certain that his friend would stay and he would stand by him in the effort to protect the people like them. Charles would have done it without Erik because he should, but now with him he felt more confident.

_'We will have to plan,'_ the telepath said.

_'Then we'll plan,'_ Erik replied.

"You know you could try including those of us who don't possess superpowers into the conversation,"Moira said, yanking them back to reality.

Charles had the decency to look a little embarrassed, Erik on the other didn't seem at all bothered by it.

"I'm sorry Moira," the telepath told her, looking at her now with a certain confidence and something else she couldn't really place.

She brushed off his apology with a smile, "That's okay, I am almost used to it."

That was not completely true. There were times when the two men would have entire conversations like this, not often though, but it always made her uncomfortable how at ease they seemed with each other. She envied the closeness they shared.

"You are correct Moira, we will have to get ahead of this soon but I think it would be best if he held off for a while, at least until we go back to Westchester," Charles said, looking very serious, "There will be things we'll have to plan for."

Erik gave a nod of agreement.

Moira looked pensive for a moment, "Very well Charles, we will do this your way."

She got up from her chair, "I've got to leave now, I have an appointment, but I'll come back tomorrow."

At that she really thought she heard Erik grunt, while Charles simply gave her a smile.

After Moira's departure, the room was plunged into silence. The telepath seemed lost in his thoughts, his gaze fixed on the wall but not seeing anything. Erik's eyes were studying him, noting the worry lines on his forehead. He reached out after a few moments and touched his friend's shoulder, breaking his focus.

Charles blinked, "Sorry, got a bit caught up."

"If you keep doing that you will end up losing," the magnetokinetic told him, grinning teasingly, trying to relieve the tension.

The mischievous smile returned to the telepath's face, "I wouldn't bet on it my friend," he replied as he moved one of his knights on the chess board, overtaking a pawn.

Erik smiled, he did like a challenge after all.

Just like that, the two men, returned to their game. They would start planning soon, they couldn't escape reality for long. There were things to be done and decisions to be made, but for now they would indulge in this small amusement and the company of each other.

**.**

**oOoTBCoOo**

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><p><strong>Review please!<strong> I would love to hear from the people who have put on alert this story or have added it to their favorites.


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing.

**A/N:** First of all thank you yet again for the awesome feedback. I am very sorry that this chapter took me so long but I am experiencing technical difficulties with my PC and my internet connection. In recompense this chapter is one of the lengthiest i have ever written.I am eagerly awaiting to hear what you think of it. Also,the poll is official closed now and as you can see the decision has been made.

**Betaed by Arcana Major**.

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><p>.<p>

**oOo**

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It was barely after sunrise that Erik woke the next day. He had tried to go back to sleep, knowing that there was nothing he could do until time for rounds came, when the doctor would sign off on his release. His attempts had failed. His stay in the hospital had thrown his sleep patterns off balance. The rotation of medication and tests had made it difficult to distinguish day and night; inside the hospital there was a peculiar sense of time, completely disjoined from the normal rhythms of life.

When he woke alone in the room, Erik knew it must have been either too early or too late as Charles was not there. The only time that had happened in the past week was when visiting hours were long over. His telepath friend refused to leave him alone at any other time and Erik was thankful for that.

The magnetokinetic let his eyes wander around his room. He had been itching to leave this place almost as soon as he had awakened, but he had been dissuaded by Charles. That didn't mean his view on staying in this room had improved. It was small and uncomfortable. Most of the time it smelled like sanitizer and the sheets were rough from the repeated washing. Even more aggravating was the constant presence of the IV in his left hand, which restricted his movements. During the first 72 hours he had been hooked up to a cardiac monitor as well, which had also been irritating, but that had been deemed redundant later on.

It was a challenge, being so restricted. But the hardest part was the flashbacks. Memories of the time he had been subjected to experiments. Bound to a chair, his head completely immobilized by restraints… Erik sat up straight; pushing those images back, to that remote part of his memory that he avoided accessing. Whenever he went down that trail of thought they seemed to come loose and flood his mind. A dull pain spread to his torso, bringing him back to reality. His abrupt movement had put a little strain on his still tender surgical scar and despite the painkillers in his system, he still felt a tug. Erik ran his right hand over the bandage on his chest.

Despite sustaining injuries before, an occupational hazard for someone in his line of work, the magnetokinetic had never stayed long in a hospital. More than anything he would have felt too exposed and if he wanted to be completely honest; a little lonely.

He had never settled down for long, always on the move. Any ties he may have had, had been short lived. Knowing he was different he had never felt at ease amongst humans. All his experiences had taught him that he couldn't trust them and that he was alone. As a result, the majority of his adult life had been spent in solitude.

Sometimes, especially when he was younger, he had wondered briefly what would have happened if his parents hadn't died when they did and in the manner they had? Would he have become a different person? Would he have been someone that could connect with other people; someone who would want to form attachments?

But it was useless to wonder about something that could not be changed. He was who he was and the solitude was his means of survival. After all by having no one beside him, he didn't risk anyone else's wellbeing but his own. That had been true for a long time.

Now, everything was different. For the first time, Erik had visitors in the hospital. Those people had spent hours in a waiting room to find out if he was going to be all right. They had actually seemed concerned for his wellbeing.

Bewilderment.

That was the most apt description for what the magnetokinetic felt in regards to that. He hadn't gone out of his way to make the young mutants comfortable in his presence. There hadn't been any instances when he had been anything but detached and a little cold around them. Yes he had helped them train and given them some advice that would come handy in a combat but that had been the extent of his interaction with them. Most of the time he had not spent training, he had chosen to spend it with Charles.

It wasn't that he didn't like the kids. On the contrary, it had felt good to be surrounded by them, people with abilities just like him. Though they were significantly younger and their experiences differed vastly, there had been instances where their antics, their conversations and their fights had made him feel like he was part of a family. The feeling had been bittersweet as the feeling had been followed by memories and images of what he had lost.

During those days at the mansion, Erik had made conscious effort not to be trapped by what he saw as an illusion. Everything had seemed so inviting, so…possible, that at times he would find himself believing that this could be his life. It was ever brief though, since soon after, the nightmares would return and with them the bitter sense that no matter how perfect the picture in front of him was, he could not be included.

So he had kept building walls between him and everyone else. He had thought he had succeeded, with the young ones at least, because keeping Charles at arm's length had been beyond him and he hadn't even wanted to try. Selfish and even disastrous as it might have proved, the telepath that had called him 'friend' from their first meeting was someone Erik wanted to hold on to. Choosing to indulge in only that particular relationship, he had simply sought to train the rest of the mutant household so that they would stand a better chance at surviving the coming conflict.

His plan hadn't worked apparently. Just hours after he had awakened to find Charles by his side, his head swimming in a haze induced by pain management drugs, the entire team had stormed in, lead by Raven.

Having donned her usual blonde human persona, the shapeshifter had approached his bed with a smile full of happiness and eyes that had been a little watery. She had expressed her joy in seeing him alive and had even proceeded to chastise him for scaring them like that.

Hank and Sean had smiled and nodded, letting her do all the talking, while Alex had given him a nod and had proceeded to examine the room uncomfortably. All young mutants, with the exception of Raven, had seemed apprehensive of him, which was no surprise given everything that had occurred on the beach, but they had seemed strangely content in seeing him conscious and apparently, on the mend. The magnetokinetic had attributed it to curiosity but had been baffled to see them return the next day. Sean had even brought him a deck of cards, while Hank had brought a few books.

Erik was certain his expression had been something weird, a mix of confusion and surprise but had chosen to simply say 'thank you', not missing Charles's warm smile. After that he had decided to put this matter, much like many others, aside for the time being, choosing not to be puzzled further by the workings of young mutant minds.

The sound of two pairs of footsteps wrenched Erik from his thoughts. Upon seeing his doctor, he realized time had passed swiftly while he had been pondering all that.

"Good morning," the doctor greeted him as he entered the room. He was followed by one of the nurses that held a tray. On it there were bandages, a dark bottle, a scalpel and some other instruments.

"Doctor," Erik said gruffly, in way of greeting.

"I see you're an early riser," the doctor commented as he took a look at the chart that hung from the bed. His trained eye skimmed through it quickly.

"Your test results are satisfactory," he stated with a nod. He put the chart back in its place and removed his stethoscope from around his neck.

"Please sit up straight," he instructed and Erik reluctantly complied, allowing him to proceed with the examination. The nurse helped him remove his gown, enough to leave his entire upper torso exposed. After which, the doctor removed the tight bandages that were wrapped all around Erik's chest, to keep his ribs in place in order to heal correctly, leaving only the one directly on his sternum, where his incision was.

Then, the doctor proceeded to listen to his heartbeat and breathing.

Keeping a neutral expression he removed his stethoscope and motioned to Erik to lie down, "Everything seems to be healing properly, let's have a look at the incision."

The magnetokinetic did as the doctor instructed, and proceeded to remove the bandage,as he carefully examined the site for any abnormal signs that would indicate that it wasn't healing properly.

"Hmm, this is healing rather nicely, the sutures will have to remain for at least a week though," he motioned to the nurse to come closer, taking a clamp that had a sponge like material attached to it from the tray, he proceeded to apply disinfectant and to change the bandage, as well as rewrapping his entire chest.

"But I can leave here today." Erik said as the nurse helped him with the gown before leaving the room. His tone of voice had made it sound more like a statement than a question.

The doctor resisted the urge to sigh as he finished dressing the wound, "Normally I would want you to remain here for at least one more week. Despite what you may think your injuries were severe. If your friends had delayed in bringing you here you would be quite possibly dead."

As he spoke, he kept his eyes on his patient's trying to convey the gravity of what he was saying. Having been in this profession for more than a decade, he was no stranger to difficult patients and from what he had heard from the nurses, this man was certainly one of them. Gossip was always expected amongst medical staff, especially because of the long hours the nurses had to cover. According to it, Erik Lensherr was apparently a very intimidating individual. Despite his good looks, the nurses of the floor avoided any interaction with him because of the coldness of his expression when anyone of them entered the room. Apparently, this particular patient was overly suspicious of the medications he was given, he seemed to resent the tests he had to undergo. Only in the presence of his friend, he would seem to relax. Which was why there had been, on occasion, some allowances made by the head-nurse for Mr. Lensherr's visiting hours to be extended.

Taking in the glare that Erik Lensherr was directing towards him, the doctor couldn't help but notice that the man in front of him indeed had something wild, almost savage about him. During the operation he had observed some scars adorning his torso; one in particular had looked too much like a bullet wound. It stood to reason to assume that this man, with the intense gaze had had not the easiest of lives. This was in accordance to another comment made by the nurses that some nights the man would experience intense nightmares.

As the man stared him down, felt his watch shrink slightly, almost biting into his flesh.

"Erik!" a startled voice broke the silence as Charles Xavier walked into the room.

His presence seemed to release the spell and the watch once again felt normal around the doctor's wrist. He even spared a glance at it, tapping it gently with his right hand but dismissed the whole thing as the result of lack of sleep.

"Good morning," the newly arrival said, with an honest smile.

The doctor noticed a brief exchange of glances between the two men and he couldn't help but notice that his patient seemed more relaxed now.

"Good morning, you arrived just in time," he returned the greeting, "I just finished my examination and from what I see, though I don't think it wise, Mr. Lensherr could be released today but…"

Seeing as both men were about to interrupt him, he lifted his hand to stop them.

"Since his injuries are so recent, he will have to refrain from any physical exercise. Bed rest for at least another week is necessary to avoid any complications and even after that the physical exertion must be minimal to nonexistent."

As he spoke he focused his eyes not on his patient but on his friend who was nodding in agreement.

"I wouldn't be able to move at all?" questioned Erik, feeling more than a little irritated. That feeling had become a constant for him ever since he had been cooped up like this.

"I understand that it is difficult, especially since you may feel significantly better by now but it is deceptive. The painkillers keep the worst of it at bay and the danger of rupture is present should you exert too much pressure on your heart or lung. Not to mention that fractured ribs take time and physical therapy to properly heal. It is preferable to err on the side of caution. As I said, normally I wouldn't release you so early, you should be constantly monitored," the doctor stated and was about to get interrupted again by Erik but continued speaking before the other man had a chance to.

"However I have been assured that you will be in the care of friends who are willing to keep an eye on you at all times," he sought Charles's reassurance at that.

"Of course doctor, we will do anything to help Erik through this," the telepath hastened to assure him, meaning every word.

"You are very lucky, should you abide by the instructions I have given you there is no reason why you should not make a full recovery. But please remember to be patient, it will take time. You should keep taking your painkillers and antibiotics diligently and should you experience any shortness of breath or pain you should come immediately to the hospital."

Charles listened to the doctor with a serious look on his face, taking in everything that he was saying while trying not to get distracted by the waves of annoyance that were coming from Erik. Oh, it would be an interesting sojourn in Westchester with the magnetokinetic, of that he had no doubt.

He couldn't fault Erik. Intellectually, he understood how frustrating it was for a man as active as his friend to be so restrained. To be forced to remain almost immobile in a room with only the occasional visitor and practically little to no self-sufficiency was not something pleasant.

The entire ordeal had been difficult for Erik given his experiences at Shaw's hands that Charles had only skimmed through that one time he had read his friend's mind. The only reason the telepath had supported the request the magnetokinetic had made about leaving the hospital was that he knew the strain that this interlude caused his friend. Hopefully at the mansion he would be given the chance to heal more smoothly, surrounded by people who cared about him.

"There is no way to have him move around a bit?" Charles questioned.

The doctor hesitated. He didn't want to risk allowing something that may compromise the health of his patient but on the other had he understood that the psychological state of the patient played a significant role in his recovery. Not to mention that stubborn patients, not given a little leeway may resort to something thoughtless and endanger their health.

"I suppose you could move around in a wheelchair. It is not much but it will grant you some mobility and independency."

Charles's eyes shined as he heard that while Erik seemed to scowl. A glance from his friend though seemed to soften him up. It seemed to the doctor that those two seemed to communicate silently.

"Thank you, for everything you have done."

As he spoke, Charles took the doctor's hand in his, shaking it. His gratitude was evident and that elicited a comforting smile from .

"I hope everything goes well," the older man said," I will be expecting you to come back in a week to check the incision site and perhaps remove the stitches."

The last part was addressed to Erik who simply nodded solemnly.

"Once again I must impress on the issue of limited activity. Not everyone who gets into such a severe boating accident survive or have such a high chance of rehabilitation," stated the doctor with a curt nod. He was insisting greatly on this because he wanted this man to take his recovery seriously.

Both men looked serious, contemplating on what he had said and the good doctor felt at perhaps he had gotten through to his patient. Hopefully he wouldn't have any emergency visits by him. Satisfied that his job was done, he greeted them and left the room, sending the nurse to settle the paperwork.

No sooner had he left, Erik turned to Charles.

"Boating accident?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

The telepath shrugged, "We couldn't very well let the good doctor know the truth now could we?"

"And so you decided to explain it away as a boating accident?" the magnetokinetic questioned looking slightly amused.

"It was Moira who used it first, thinking this was the best way to explain the crushing injuries, I just picked up where she left off," Charles replied in a careless tone as he moved closer to his friend's side.

The mention of the female CIA agent's name had a peculiar effect on Erik, whose expression changed into a blank one.

"Oh come on, I don't understand why you dislike her," the telepath commented with a tinge of frustration in his voice as he sat down on the right side of the bed.

The magnetokinetic simply gave him an incredulous look.

Charles smiled, an honest open smile, "She has been very supportive to you, to us all. She even came here with me today to-"

Surprise became evident on Erik's face upon hearing this, "She's here?"

"Yes, she had mentioned yesterday that she would come by. We drove here together; she is now downstairs bringing the wheelchair I believe," the tone of the telepath's voice was light and happy as if he was conveying the best of news. Erik felt like strangling him, just a bit.

"Moira is truly a wonderful person; you should really try to get to know her better my friend."

The magnetokinetic resisted the urge to huff. He could swear that Charles was doing all this on purpose. There was no way he hadn't perceived what was going on. In Erik's mind it was obvious that the woman was infatuated with Charles, not that he could blame her. It was impossible to meet the man and not like him, something about him, his openness perhaps, made him irresistible. He conveyed trust, even to someone like Erik, who really couldn't trust anyone completely. If he could, he would trust Charles.

Eyeing his friend, the magnetokinetic tied to assess whether the other man was reading his thoughts. He had avoided the subject of the use of the telepaths powers for the past week but he knew he should now mention what had been on his mind.

"Charles."

"Yes, Erik."

The telepath was looking at his friend with a serene expression with a hint of cheerfulness, as he moved his eyes from the window, where he had been staring, back to the magnetokinetic by his side.

_Are you reading my mind?_

Erik asked.

_No, not actively. This is just communication, the most pronounced surface thoughts directed towards someone; like you are doing now._

"So this is different from actual mind reading."

The magnetokinetic concluded, reverting back to actual speech.

"Marginally so," Charles acquiesced, a hint of a frown appearing on his forehead, "Is there something on your mind my friend?"

"I-" he started saying, only to be interrupted by the arrival of one of the nurses.

The woman looked hesitantly at him, "I'm here to take out the IV and someone has to fill out the paperwork for the patient to be discharged." she said.

The telepath nodded, "I'll go," giving her a reassuring smile as he got up from the bed. He looked at Erik, "I won't be long."

The nurse injected him with an antibiotic and a painkiller before slowly removing the IV, she was saying something about the next dosage but Erik was not paying attention.

.

**oOo**

.

When Charles returned, Erik was already sitting on his bed, having donned his black pants and was in the process of putting on the simple white shirt that Raven had bought him. Though he was free of his IV, his movements were restrained.

"Everything is settled," the telepath spoke out loud, gaining the attention of his friend.

Erik was still in the process of buttoning the shirt as he turned slightly to face Charles and the latter could see clearly the bandage on his friend's chest. The telepath almost winced, the sight was a reminder of having almost lost Erik and if he was honest, he felt partially responsible for it. There was a part of him that couldn't help but wonder what if? What if he had managed to get to Shaw in another way or sooner? Erik wouldn't have been so injured but-

He stopped that trail of thought because he knew it would lead to questions he didn't want to explore, to possibilities that he didn't want to face. It was better to act upon what had happened and not what might have happened. Now, here, both he and Erik were alive and perhaps given an opportunity to try again, a chance to reconcile their differences and work upon their similarities to pave a different path.

For now, more important than anything else was Erik's recovery and Charles was determined to help him in any way. He had put everything aside, regarding the things he and the magnetokinetic would eventually have to talk about, in order to be here for his friend. He was fully aware that the next few weeks would be difficult for Erik but he hoped to make things more bearable for him.

"Where is Moira?" Erik questioned idly, "I would have imagined she would have been here by now."

"She is downstairs, I asked her to wait for me to contact her since you seemed to want to talk to me about something," Charles explained as he came to stand in front of his friend.

"Hmm," the magnetokinetic muttered dismissively, taking a brief look at his attire. The clothes were simple and comfortable, "I will have to thank Raven for bringing these for me."

"You wouldn't be saying that if you knew the truth my friend," the telepath laughed, earning a puzzled expression from Erik.

"I am afraid my sister is a little extravagant when it comes to shopping," upon seeing the magnetokinetic raise an eyebrow he clarified, "Let's just say her plan involved pink."

Erik had to suppress a look of horror at that thought but something must have shown through as Charles remarked, "Quite so. It was Moira that managed to persuade Raven to purchase something more…tame."

"I'm surprised she managed to do that, Raven can be quite stubborn," Erik commented looking more appreciatively at his clothes but reluctant to admit he owed anything to Moira.

"Usually it is almost impossible to change my darling sister's mind but I do believe her training in the CIA was of use," Charles explained, his mirth evident in his eyes that twinkled slightly, "Oh, and I believe a comment about you looking marvelous in anything you wore," he added as an afterthought.

That gained him a laugh from the magnetokinetic, especially since a slight blush appeared on Charles's face which made Erik wonder if that opinion was shared by his telepath friend.

"But we keep getting sidetracked I believe."

The remark brought Erik's mind back to the issue that he had wanted to discuss, but for a moment he didn't know how to start. He sat down at the side of the bed and motioned to his friend to do the same.

The telepath complied.

"Raven has told me that you made her a promise never to read her mind," the magnetokinetic started saying.

"Yes, when we were little," Charles replied softly. Now he realized where this was heading, what Erik would ask of him.

The magnetokinetic turned to look straight into the telepath's eyes, "I wonder; would you make me such a promise?"

For a moment silence filled the small room as Erik awaited his friend's answer, though he knew what it would be.

"If it would ease your mind my friend, I would," Charles spoke very definitively but there was a hint of disappointment and hurt in his expression. They were minute but even though Erik was no telepath, he had learned from experience to read people and by now he knew Charles Xavier quite well.

Hurting him was something he detested but in this instance there wasn't anything he could do but this.

"Why request this of me now?" the telepath couldn't help but ask.

"You want us to make an effort, to build something together, I want it as well. The communication is something I don't mind but the rest… " Erik didn't know exactly how to say what he wanted to say.

He took a deep breath, "I know you told me you know everything about me. I am sure you have indeed seen my thoughts regarding Shaw but do you truly know everything? If not I would like to keep some things to myself."

"I understand," Charles's tone was soft but layered with sadness as he spoke those two words.

He did understand; the need for privacy, the need to hold on to something totally your own, it was something he could comprehend with clarity. The mind was meant to be something impenetrable, that belonged only to one person and only that person was meant to have access to it.

Partially Erik was correct in assuming he didn't in fact know everything. To study a mind he would need time and effort, to sort out everything and put them in context. The brain was difficult to navigate and it required concentration. The only things he had gotten from the man he had come to call his friend had been those loud thoughts that had overwhelmed him that night he had pulled Erik out of the water.

"You have my word Erik that I will not venture into your mind uninvited," he stated finally, looking straight into the magnetokinetic's eyes, trying to convey his determination and sincerity.

Erik nodded, his expression was blank but he seemed to relax imperceptibly.

There was a quiet click as Moira appeared, pushing a metallic wheelchair through the open door.

"You called?" she asked with a hint of amusement in her voice that almost made Erik twitch. She looked too happy for his taste about this.

"Come on," she motioned to the chair, "let's get you out of here, Raven and the others are back in the mansion and are waiting for us. She said she would cook to commemorate your return."

While Erik was shooting murderous looks at Moira, Charles groaned, "Oh dear god. Let's just hope there is a house to return to."

"Why? Isn't Raven a good cook?" Moira questioned, looking intrigued.

Erik rolled his eyes. He had firsthand knowledge of the shapeshifter's attempts in the kitchen and none of them had ended well.

"You have no idea," was the only thing Charles said as he shook his head in mock desperation.

Deeming it indeed time to leave, Erik remotely wrestled control of the wheelchair from Moira, with his abilities and brought it in front of him, forcing Charles to step aside. The female CIA agent spared him a disapproving look before glancing at the door to make sure no one saw that.

The only reason Erik was complying with all this was because he knew Charles wouldn't let him leave otherwise. With no great difficulty he sat on the chair, almost inattentive to his slightly painful sensation at his ribcage. However, he did not miss the fact that his friend had awaited readily by his side in case he required assistance.

If anybody else had done that, Erik would have bitten their heads off. He was his own man, independent and self-sufficient. He could handle himself without assistance. Never had he asked for help. But, though infuriating, the care Charles showed towards him made his heart warm slightly.

"Don't do that again," Moira scolded, "we don't want to attract attention, especially as Charles has already been kind enough to have handled the issue of our arrival here."

She spoke through her teeth as the telepath moved behind the chair, placing his hands on the handles.

The magnetokinetic's eyes widened slightly. This newly revealed aspect of Charles's abilities was something that surprised him, though it really shouldn't. After everything he had seen and after what he himself had accomplished, erasing memories or altering them didn't seem farfetched. But in conjunction with everything else, it really brought home how powerful Charles really was and how terrifying he could be.

Briefly he wondered at how that power could have been abused by someone else. What really was a mystery though, was the fact that despite the knowledge of the extent of these abilities, he didn't fear Charles. Some part deep inside him trusted him. It was a flawed trust, not complete; because Erik had been broken and reshaped but that part of him had stayed shattered. His survival had deemed it necessary for him to always have a contingency, never to give to anyone or anything fully. He had always had to keep something for himself. That was why he had wanted that promise from Charles, even at the cost of hurting him.

"A little patience and soon we will be amongst friends," the telepath murmured, probably trying to distract him from asking any questions about what Moira had mentioned.

Erik felt himself being wheeled away, towards the door. He didn't spare a glance behind him to look at the room. He was glad that finally he was out of it and out of that bed, even if the alternative was this chair.

He did spare a glance towards Charles, who gave him that warm smile that made everyone relax.

"Fine, after all, as I understand it we should hurry," the magnetokinetic acquiesced, deciding that the ride back was enough time to explain to him what the telepath had done in detail, "we have to save the house from your sister."

He smiled a mischievous smile as he said the last part. Charles laughed in delight. For the millionth time Erik was captivated by the sight, his friend was radiant when he laughed. It suited him to be like this.

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**oOoTBCoOo**

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><p><em>Review!<em>


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: **I still own nothing.

**A/N:** Due to the help of my lovely beta, every chapter will be replaced by a new one who has been betaed, making them easier on the eyes. Enjoy and don't forget to review and tell me your thoughts.

**Beta: **Arcana Major

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><p><strong>.<strong>

**oOo**

**.**

"I have to admit that the only situation I was prepared to face was disaster," Charles looked inquisitively around the dinner table, at the young mutants sitting opposite him. "But this is truly wonderful," he concluded as he took another bite of the chicken on his plate.

"Really Charles, you have no faith in my abilities," Raven smiled cockily. She was in her natural blue form, which she tended to adopt whenever she could. To Charles that showed how much she had come to terms with herself and her ability. He was glad for her; she had managed to grow in such a short time.

"On the contrary my dear sister, I greatly respect your abilities, it is your cooking skills that I question," he gave her a teasing look.

"I should be offended but in this instance I have to admit I had help," she replied, briefly crossing her hands in front of her. There was a hint of amusement and arrogance in her voice; overall she seemed quite pleased with herself.

"Help?" Alex questioned, fixing an incredulous glance on the shifter, "You threatened us with castration if we didn't get off our butts to help. in preparing this meal," he gestured to the plates in front of them.

The food wasn't anything elaborate. Chicken with potatoes in the oven accompanied by a green salad and what appeared to be a yellowish sauce.

"Raven…" the telepath said and his tone held a hint of disapproval.

"Don't worry Charles, no one got hurt," she hastened to assure him, glaring daggers at her accuser.

"Yeah, after we banned Alex from the kitchen for breaking three plates," Sean commented absentmindedly before munching another potato.

That earned him the immediate attention of Alex, who pointed at him with his fork as he spoke in protest, "That wasn't my fault! You tripped me."

"That was the third time and I was trying to swipe up the broken pieces!" the redhead provided, putting his utensils down. "I almost cut off a finger in doing so," he added, lifting his right hand to show his thumb that was wrapped in a bandage.

Alex just shrugged as he turned his attention back to his food, "It was your fault for being so clumsy."

"Oh, I was the clumsy one was I?"

Charles resisted the urge to bring his fingers to his temple. Instead he closed his eyes briefly, before addressing the people around him. "Please calm down, it's been some time since we enjoyed a good meal and I would appreciate a degree of quiet if you please."

Both of teens exchanged a brief glance. "Sorry Professor," they muttered simultaneously.

"Here have some sauce, Hank made it, he's a great cook," Raven's words made the blue furred mutant look away shyly. Surely he would be blushing if he had his previous guise.

"Poor bozo, he had to try the three failed attempts you made at chicken roasting before this one," Alex commented with a smile, earning a glare from both the shapeshifter and Hank.

"Alex, what have I told you about addressing Hank like that?" Charles asked, giving a slightly chastising look at the younger man.

It amazed him how childish they could be and yet how many things they had accomplished. Alex in particular had made tremendous progress with his control and his behavior, not that he didn't still need guidance but his efforts so far had been rewarded.

"It's endearing," he replied.

The telepath shook his head slightly before looking at the younger man in the eyes, "I am afraid neither Hank nor Raven find it so."

"I don't mind Professor," the blue furred mutant said.

"Well I do," Raven's yellow eyes sparkled with a hint of indignation as she looked at Alex.

"I made the salad," Sean eagerly informed, diverting the attention of everyone. The redhead seemed very pleased with himself in managing to cut some vegetables and Alex was more than willing to point that out, effectively starting another round of mild bickering.

With a sigh Charles tuned them out, casting his eyes towards Moira who seemed to be enjoying her food and was in the process of complimenting Raven for her cooking. In return, his sister beamed at her no longer paying attention to Alex and Sean.

Erik was sitting at the far end of the table. Content to have been almost forgotten after the first bursts of excitement that had accompanied their arrival at the mansion, mainly from Raven, truth be told. The others, though happy for his return, didn't manage to hide their apprehension for long and had, seemingly decided to give both Erik and themselves some space.

The magnetokinetic was not perturbed by this in the slightest. It gave him relative peace and allowed him to observe freely everything that was going on around him. He particularly enjoyed the youngsters' antics and how Charles reacted to them. Though usually the telepath had about him the same carelessness that the younger mutants displayed, he would on occasion display a more serious attitude more akin to how a teacher would approach and talk to a group of students. Both Erik and Raven had dubbed this the 'professor' mode.

On Erik's lips a hint of a smile appeared as his eyes found Charles's.

_How does it feel to be home?_

The telepath was surprised to hear the magnetokinetic's voice in his mind, before realizing that the thought was directed at him. Erik was speaking to him and Charles couldn't help but feel a bit confused. He had tried to hide his disappointment when Erik asked him to promise him not to use his powers on him. He had thought they had made progress ever since the magnetokinetic had woken on that hospital bed and had reached out mentally to Charles. Not once had he asked about the helmet and the telepath had felt that Erik had seen that he had no need of it. On the other hand it was a sign of trust that the magnetokinetic had only asked for a promise, even though it was Charles's suspicion that Erik knew that the telepath never ventured to his friends minds uninvited. The truth was that if felt more like a test to Charles. It was like Erik was telling him that if the promise ever was broken then it would be the end of all this, of them.

_I am glad to be home. Can't fault them for being a bit…lively._

He answered his friend, trying to quench the bitterness that usually arose whenever he thought of his friendship with Erik breaking. Something must have shown through because he saw the magnetokinetic's brow furrow.

Raven must have noticed something as well since he heard her talk to him, "Are you okay Charles?"

Much to the telepath's dismay it appeared that everyone was now looking attentively at him. All conversation had been halted.

"I am fine. Sorry, must have zoned out," he smiled dismissively as he took another bite from his food, trying to prove his point.

It didn't seem to work as the shifter abruptly reached out and grabbed his wrist, interrupting him, "Look at me Charles. You're not having a headache again are you?"

The telepath almost winced at her question; he hadn't wanted Erik to hear about this.

"No Raven, I feel quite all right. But I would appreciate that the discussion amongst us be conducted in a more serene manner."

"Oh, okay," she replied, the concern receding visibly as she released her brother.

The others seemed to relax as well at his reassurance.

Erik on the other hand was giving him a look, something between worry, curiosity and irritation. He didn't say a thing but the telepath had no doubt he would press him later for an explanation.

**.**

**oOo**

**.**

After lunch, the entire household retreated to one of the lounges. It was one of the more spacious rooms in the manor, with four couches and several armchairs of a design evocative of the baroque period. Neither Raven nor Charles had ever liked it but it was suitable to host several guests which made it ideal for time such as this, when they needed to discuss some things as a team.

"So Professor, what did you have in mind?" Alex was, quite predictably the one to break the silence as they all had taken their places.

They had rearranged the furniture slightly so that they were all in a circle, facing each other. Raven was sitting on the sofa next to Hank, Moira and Charles were sharing another one, Erik, as per doctor's orders was confined to his wheelchair, which didn't appear to displease him as much as was possible because he could move it around without touching it and it gave him a degree of freedom. Sean and Alex had chosen to seat down in two of the armchairs.

Charles's eyes wondered around, taking in the faces of the people around him. They were his friends, his family. He had never imagined that one day he would be back in this house with a group of people with abilities, his brothers in every sense of the word and that he would finally feel at ease, like this was really home.

Life was truly unpredictable but right now Charles was glad that those series of events had brought them all together. All of them were people he trusted, his comrades in arms, but more importantly, they were the ones he wanted to face the future with.

For a moment, his eyes lingered on Erik, before he turned his attention to Alex, "After the events in Cuba some loose ends were not properly addressed."

At the mention of the island, the young mutants couldn't help but cast a glance towards the injured member of their team. Erik was sitting, seemingly unperturbed.

"What do you mean?" Raven questioned as she crossed her hands in front of her. Hank shifted his position, sitting more on the edge of the couch, his legs firmly touching the intricate carpet that covered every inch of the floor.

"During that incident and in our effort to help we have revealed the existence of mutants to the two most powerful governments of the world, assuming they did not have prior knowledge like our CIA did," the telepath made a dismissing motion at that, obviously considering it not very important. Everyone was listening attentively at what he was saying.

"We cannot contain the knowledge; it is too wide spread."

"Couldn't you…" Raven's voice trailed away as she uttered those words tentatively. This was something she didn't usually bring up, the true extent of Charles's abilities. She knew it bothered him and she chose to stir clear of the subject, especially since she was kind of intimidated by that aspect of his power. Even though she knew that Charles would never use it without a very good reason and never against his friends.

The others exchanged inquisitive glances, obviously waiting for an explanation. The shapeshifter was surprised to see that only Erik seemed uninterested. Briefly she wondered if he knew. Despite their expectation neither sibling provided an answer.

Charles side stepped the issue completely and continued, "What we can do is erase any information the CIA may have on us. Not only about the members of our team but any other leads that were provided by the use of Cerebro."

"To what end Professor?" Hank asked.

"We need time, to organize and we also need to give them time to adjust to the idea of the mutants' existence, our existence," the telepath stated, quite firmly.

"That's all nice and good but who will go destroy the files?" Erik's voice was demanding and hard. Irritation was seeping through, it was obvious that he knew the answer to his question and he didn't like it.

"Moira?" questioned Alex, looking at the woman who up till now sat calmly and silently by Charles's side.

"She cannot do this alone, I will go with her," the telepath explained.

"Shouldn't we come with you too Professor?" Alex asked as Sean nodded at his words, showing his agreement and eagerness.

Hank interrupted, "It is something that requires discretion. They have to go in and out without being noticed. You both have very attention grabbing abilities."

Alex seemed about to protest but Charles stopped him, "Hank is right, we need to get in and get out silently."

"Then I can go with you, I can blend in perfectly," Raven said and to prove her point she shifted into one of the agents she had seen walking about the main building in the CIA.

"I don't see why not. This should be quite straightforward. I have located the files, so we won't have to search for them," Moira informed with a smile.

A strange metallic sound was heard, startling everyone. Looking for the source of the sound, they saw that one of the lamps had been broken, its metal decorations and parts were twisted, having folded into themselves, crushing the porcelain underneath. Charles looked at Erik whose face was a mask of displeasure.

"Can you please leave me and Erik alone for a moment," he asked.

Everyone obliged, filling out of the room somewhat reluctantly, with Raven closing the door behind her.

"Why do this now?" Erik demanded rather than posing a question. His voice was hard.

_When I can't come with you? When I can't protect you?_

The thoughts running through his mind weren't rational, he knew that. It was the urge he couldn't control when it came to Charles, an almost primal need to protect him. He didn't voice them.

"We have already delayed it too much," the telepath replied calmly, in an almost conversational tone, as he got up from his seat and moved a few paces away from the sofa.

The magnetokinetic gave a nod. He knew it was true, this had to be done. But he didn't want Charles going there without him. Raven was good for an infiltration and relatively adequate in hand to hand combat but she was not enough if this went south. Moira on the other hand had training but Erik couldn't trust her, he wanted to be there, to make sure…

"I should-"

The telepath cut him off with a firm shake of the head, "You should concentrate on getting better."

"But-"

Turning to face the magnetokinetic, he sought to make eye contact, "Erik, please. Trust me, this is nothing, there is almost no risk."

The assurance didn't have an effect on the magnetokinetic.

_Almost doesn't mean no risk at all._

"I thought we were doing this together." Erik stated.

The telepath nodded, looking at his friend squarely in the eyes, there was something there that the magnetokinetic couldn't quite place and it bothered him. "We are, but this is something that has to be tended to right now. We don't know if or when they may move those files."

"You are going there to erase the memories of the people who know about our identities aren't you?" Again, it was more a statement than a question and something nudged at Erik's mind as he spoke those words.

Somehow, though veiled, his words had made Charles a little uncomfortable. It became apparent when he evaded the other man's eyes as he spoke this time. "Yes, that is what I intend to do. Though I do not know how well it will work."

"When did you decide all this?"

Charles rubbed his forehead, he could feel the tingling of an incoming headache. He had expected Erik's reaction and he had to make his friend see that this was the only thing they could do now, under the circumstances. "Today, when Moira told me she had confirmed exactly where those files are. She will arrange a meeting with the people there who have knowledge of us, of this team."

"I will come with you."

"Absolutely not!" the telepath made a firm motion with his right hand, "You are in no condition. You just got out of the hospital-"

"I am fine!" the magnetokinetic insisted, gripping the metallic chair and lifting himself up to demonstrate the truth of his words.

"No you are not! Please Erik, sit back down!" Charles was pleading, eyes wide with worry.

The dull ache that Erik had felt as he got up, intensified and he gripped his side, wincing.

"Are you in pain?" the telepath was instantly in front of him, his voice filled with anxiety and a hint of fear. The intensity of his feelings was displayed in his eyes, communicating his concern.

"It's nothing, I am okay," Erik grunted as he sat back down to the chair.

"I should get Hank," Charles said but only took a few steps back, his eyes searching for any other signs of distress in his friend's expression or body language.

The magnetokinetic waved a dismissing hand, hoping to stop him from summoning anyone. "No need."

"Perhaps we shouldn't have brought you home so soon," the telepath almost mumbled under his breath.

"I am fine Charles!" Erik pounded his hand on the hand of his wheelchair, exasperated.

"NO YOU ARE NOT!"

Charles's outburst surprised them both, as it was followed by a deep silence. The two men simply stared at each other, disbelief written all over their faces. Two pairs of blue eyes connected.

"I- I'm sorry my friend" the telepath was the first to break the silence, "I didn't mean to yell."

Charles slumped into one of the armchairs, bringing his hand on his face.

"You don't know how difficult those hours were, at the hospital." He took a deep breath, aware that Erik was looking at him tentatively and slightly surprised. He looked at his hands, they were trembling slightly. He hadn't told his friend how some times he would see blood on them, Erik's blood. How the thought of losing him had suffocated him. Even now he felt his breath hitch at the memory.

The magnetokinetic's expression softened, he willed his chair closer, so that he could take Charles's hands into his.

"I am here, I am right here."

The telepath looked up, meeting Erik's eyes. There was sorrow there, reflected inside those bright pools of blue, the magnetokinetic could clearly see it; it was almost palpable.

"But you almost were not."

_I almost lost you._

Charles's mental voice held something, it sounded almost like a plea. But Erik didn't know how to answer it, what it was that the telepath was asking of him. Two conflicting emotions arose in him. Sadness, for having caused pain to the person he valued more than anyone in his life and joy, because someone cared deeply enough to feel such sorrow as Charles had.

"You didn't lose me Charles, I am right here, by your side." He spoke, lacing his fingers with the telepath's, examining his slender fingers as they intertwined with his own. Soft hands, unused to hardship, so unlike his callused hands, used to handling weapons and inflicting death. One more proof of how different they were.

Again he wondered what he was doing there, when so many things separated him from the man whose hands he was holding. It was then that it became clear to him that the answer was in fact right in front of him.

Charles.

The good mannered, infuriatingly hopeful, brilliant, blue eyed telepath who had dove into freezing waters to save him and had never let go of his hand. Much like now, Charles had not made any indications of wanting to avoid Erik's touch.

Instead, the telepath had held him firmly. Brought him to the surface, prompted him to stay, helped him develop his abilities and had made him feel almost at home. Even after the beach and everything that had happened there, he had still asked him to stay; he had still wanted him.

Charles's fingers moved, intertwining with his own. Rather than shying away from the touch, the telepath was actively seeking it. Instantly his eyes found Charles's face, too close to his own. He was looking at him serenely; the physical contact had seemingly calmed him down.

They say eyes are windows to the soul and as he looked at Charles's eyes now he would agree, for all there was reflected there was care, compassion and hope, always hope. He always felt warmth flood his chest whenever he looked at the telepath. A strange kind of comfort; a sense of belonging. The man in front of him was everything Erik was not but somehow, he was everything he wanted. Not just as a friend and a comrade, he wanted Charles in ways that the other man perhaps would take offence. He had felt the attraction from the moment they had met. It had only escalated during the trip to find the other mutants. At first he had chosen to ignore it, because he had a goal and there was nothing that could interfere with that. Later, after getting to know Charles, he had decided to suppress his wants because he didn't want to risk loosing Charles.

Having lived alone, he had learned to be honest with himself and to not care about other people. He wasn't conflicted about being attracted to another man, such things held no real meaning to him. But he couldn't ignore the probability that the telepath didn't share his views. So he had chosen to stay by his side in any capacity he could. The title of friend would have to suffice.

It was the magnetokinetic the one who first withdrew from the contact, bringing his hands on his lap.

Charles's gaze fell on his fingers, now free of the other man's hold, they felt a little cold.

"My friend," the word tasted strangely bitter in his mouth, "please take care of yourself. I never again want to feel how I did when they took you away, barely hanging on."

A moment passed. Both men staring at each other but saying nothing.

"I am not letting you go there without me," Erik stated, determined, " You say it is a simple mission but what if it turns out to be a trap? Last I checked, I was the only one that could deflect bullets."

"You are in no condition to come with us Erik! Moira, Raven and I can handle it."

Erik shook his head, "No you can't. Not when you are so hesitant to use your ability!"

This stopped Charles on his tracks. His expression revealed that Erik had found the reason behind the uneasiness that the telepath had displayed earlier in the conversation.

"I don't need to have your gift to see that something is bothering you. Ever since you mentioned it at the hospital there was the hint of apprehension. I didn't press you then but now I want to know why," the magnetokinetic said firmly.

Charles seemed hesitant. He got up and moved away a few paces. For a moment he appeared to be thinking about it. He was biting his lower lip, nervously.

"I-I can't Erik, I am sorry." He finally said, with a shake of his head. Turning and walking swiftly towards the door.

The magnetokinetic didn't try to stop him. He let him go, knowing full well that there were some things that couldn't be shared until one was ready. Some memories and experiences were too difficult to talk about and others, Erik doubted he would ever be able to put into words. They would remain hidden, tucked away in a corner of his mind, like secrets are meant to.

What he hadn't suspected though, was that Charles may carry scars of his own, things he couldn't talk about.

So he was left alone in the living room, deep in thought, wondering if he had been fooled by the calm demeanor that the telepath usually showed.

**.**

**oOoTBCoOo**

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	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: **I still own nothing.

**A/N:** I am sorry this update took so long, things should go back to normal from now on. Also, I want to thank Alicia for her reviews because I can't do it through pms and I want to thank all of you for your reviews are a great motivation for me.

**Beta: **Arcana Major

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><p>Erik was angry.<p>

Granted, that was something of a constant in his life. Before meeting Charles, anger was his only refuge, his one true ally, the burning sensation in his lungs that made his heart pump faster, that made him survive. It was his savior and his lifeline, without which he would have long been consumed by the guilt, agony, fear that lurked underneath. He knew the name of those feelings but he had forgotten what they meant. He had had to in order to keep himself sane. Anger had kept those feelings at bay and kept Erik in control.

But Charles had changed that. The telepath had peeled back the blanket, even if it was slightly and he had showed Erik another way, not only to enable him to use his powers but also to live his life. It was but a glimpse, but that little crack Charles had made opened up Erik's soul to something else, something he had long thought lost; the capacity to feel anything apart from anger and more importantly, the will to take the risk and to care for another person.

It was that specific emotion that made his situation now so different. He cared. Deep inside the anger there was worry; about Charles. Having connected to the telepath in such a way, he had awakened other feelings inside him as well, fear being one of the strongest. Even though he would never admit to it out loud, he knew it to be true. Having been alone for the longest of times, without someone to trust, meant that Erik had become very acquainted with himself, having no one else to fall back on. Consequently he was honest with himself and knew what he wanted. So despite his resolution to not press Charles about revealing what he was unwilling to, he couldn't help but be curious about it.

For the rest of the day Charles had succeeded in evading him. Apparently the children were monopolizing his attention but the magnetokinetic wasn't too inclined to believe that, it seemed too convenient. Every time he approached Charles, one of the young mutants would come looking for him, asking something or another and the telepath would simply cast an apologizing look towards Erik, to which the magnetokinetic would answer with a glare. He knew that the telepath was avoiding him and the continuation of their little argument.

Raven appeared later that day in his room, where Erik had decided to retreat for the time being. Despite his attempts to appear completely in shape, he was in fact tired. The painkillers were beginning to wear off and it was about time to take the next dose. During the time it took for the pills to kick in, Erik would truly feel the extent of his injuries and for that he really needed to lie down. The shapeshifter seemed to have taken over for her brother, to check up on him and make sure he followed the doctor's instructions. She didn't say as much, but it was pretty obvious. Seeing it as an opportunity, Erik decided to ask her about the issue with Charles.

"What is going on with Charles?"

His question was direct and to the point and it seemed to take her by surprise.

"What do you mean?" She asked and her defensive tone and the fact that she had her arms crossed in front of her told him that she knew to what he was referring.

"He is having issues about the memory wipe," Erik elaborated hastily, knowing she would be the only person to understand what he meant. It was improbable that Charles had shared that particular aspect of his powers with anyone else.

Raven exhaled sharply. Her posture relaxed slightly, which made Erik even more suspicious.

"Oh! That…"

He looked at her sharply, "Yes, that."

"You really should talk to him about it," she shook her head and shrugged, unwilling to share anything more. Her gaze held the one Erik was giving her.

"I tried that, he didn't seem too eager," the magnetokinetic confessed, suppressing a sigh of frustration. Both siblings seem to enjoy making him work for the information he wanted.

"Give him time then," Raven told him finally, looking at him sternly.

"Are you not concerned about it at all?" Erik's voice was raised as he spoke. He gestured in the air, letting some of his irritation show, "There is the mission that he insists on going."

"I don't think it will affect the mission," she countered, keeping an even expression. She really looked like she believed that to be true, which in turn made the magnetokinetic slightly calmer. "It is nothing really. You shouldn't be concerned about it," her assurance, though believable was countered by the fact that she avoided eye contact as she spoke. She also seemed eager to leave the room, but Erik's question made her halt.

"Is there something else I should be concerned about?"

Narrowed blue eyes, sharp like daggers clashed with slightly widened yellow. But Raven was stubborn, a trait she shared with her adopted brother. Instead of caving in, like most of the residents of this house would have done, she simply shook her head and smiled.

"No, not a thing."

Erik knew he was being lied to but he didn't know what it was about. Without anyone to give him answers, he just lay back in his bed, taking in the silence of the room and trying to concentrate on any metal that was around him. It was an exercise he found soothing, much like meditating and it helped him think. He squeezed his eyes shut and concentrated to the element that seemed to sing to him, clenching his teeth as the pain begun to return. It would take a few minutes for the painkillers to kick in and until then this was the best way to keep the pain at bay.

Without even realizing it, slowly the fatigue settled in, making his eyes heavy. The medication must have also played a part as a pleasant haze filled his mind. His frustration was disappearing as he was enveloped by a comforting darkness; calm and inviting.

As always, his last thought was of Charles, before he let himself be swept away into a dreamless sleep.

**.**

**oOo**

**.  
><strong>

True to Erik's conclusion, Charles had been indeed avoiding him. Many times he had used the younger mutants as a shield to prevent Erik from engaging in another argument with him. As soon as the magnetokinetic would appear in a room, Charles would pretend to be otherwise occupied with the training of one of the younglings. He knew it was childish and that it couldn't continue forever but he needed time; especially since Raven had informed him later that day that Erik had questioned her about him.

Charles knew he was being unfair. He could recognize the hypocrisy of his actions. Erik was entitled to be angry at him. After all he knew things about the magnetokinetic that no one else knew; secrets that Erik might never have revealed if he had been given the chance. But Charles knew them, he had reached out and touched his mind and in doing so, even though it was not completely intentional, he had gained access to some things that were too traumatic for the magnetokinetic to talk about.

Even now, after they had come close, after they had shared a great many things, Erik never actually spoke of Shaw and what he had done to him. He would make brief references about experiments but never anything specific. Up till now he had never spoken of the way his mother had died, even though Charles was privy to the smallest details of those moments that were so agonizing to Erik, even after all this time.

Trauma was not something that could be healed completely. It was a process for anyone who had undergone a hellish ordeal to face the facts, to talk about them and then to move on. The pieces of their souls that had been shattered by the actions of others would never fully heal. There would be times when the memories returned, when the nightmares would once again haunt their dreams. But those incidents would eventually become less potent and after a while, less frequent. The victim could live a relatively normal life but not without first externalizing what he had been through, the source of the trauma.

This knowledge didn't help Charles. His help towards Erik was incomplete because his powers stood in the way. Victims, like Erik had some times difficulty trusting and his ability was a huge deterrent for the magnetokinetic. Though it was obvious he wanted to trust someone, he seemed to want to trust Charles, it wasn't easy for him and given Erik's request the telepath could only conclude that his abilities were an obstacle in that.

The very use of telepathy went against what psychology taught that should be done for people with such psychological scars. It was a tool in attempting to understand what the person had gone through but nothing more.

Not that Charles wanted to be Erik's personal counselor but he wanted to help him. He wanted to see him rid of his hate, living a life that had been denied him. He hoped with all his heart that the magnetokinetic would find peace but more than that, that he would find happiness. In Charles's eyes no one deserved it more than Erik, to be happy.

Deep inside, the telepath hoped to gain Erik's trust. Now that Shaw was no longer a threat to anyone, he wanted to see the magnetokinetic move forward, no longer restrained by the chains of his past. But to do so Erik needed a nudge, a push to the right direction, someone to show him through experience that there was indeed more to life than just pain and anger.

Unfortunately Charles now doubted he could be the one to do it. Not until he was ready to share with Erik some of his own scars and mistakes. And right now he didn't feel like he could do that. He knew it was incredibly selfish of him, he recognized it. Erik had always been astute. So it hadn't come as a surprise when he had seen through him. Even though he usually let his anger rule him, Erik had been actually very patient when he had seen his hesitation, he had not pressed Charles for answers, he had waited for the telepath to speak to him. So now Charles could not blame him for being angry, he blamed his own reluctance.

As a result, the fact that Erik burst in his bedroom the next day, effectively waking him up from his troubled sleep, came as no surprise to the telepath.

**.**

**oOo**

**.**

Erik had slept for many hours, uncharacteristically for him. He had rested, having been spared the dreams that usually accompanied such deep sleep, or more accurately, the nightmares. So, upon waking up he felt that a great portion of his energy had been restored.

He had gotten dressed in a hurry, donning a simple black turtleneck and the first pair of grey pants his found in his closet. As a precautionary measure, he took his pills a little earlier than he should have, trying to avoid the intervals were the pain returned. His focus had to be undivided, as he spoke to Charles, for he was determined to confront him. Not so much for his secrets, but for the mission with Moira.

He knew that forcing the telepath to reveal anything would be counterproductive. Charles could not be made to do what he didn't want to and Erik didn't want to pressure him right now. Even if he felt the anger stir every time he thought about the knowledge the telepath had gleaned off him, without his permission. So, instead, he had chosen to wait and see if the telepath would come to him eventually.

For the moment, the fact that Charles may have already made plans to leave for Langley was of greater importance. The main concern being that he would be too far for anyone to offer help if anything happened, with only Raven and Moira to back him up. And though Erik had infinite trust in Raven to try and keep her brother safe, he was less trusting of the CIA agent.

Normally he wouldn't have worried…much. If Charles was completely on his game there was no power great enough to stop him. But that wasn't the case now. Perhaps from a moral point of view or perhaps for another reason entirely, though Erik suspected it was both, the telepath was reluctant to use that part of his ability that enabled him to wipe out memories. That hesitation was dangerous in the magnetokinetic's mind. It could prove to be a distraction and that could be catastrophic.

With those things in mind, he wheeled himself into Charles's room and much to his surprise he found the telepath sleeping fitfully, tossing and didn't have time to think about leaving and returning later as the telepath opened his eyes, sitting up as he did, instantly aware, as if someone had pressed a button.

"Erik."

Not a question.

The magnetokinetic wondered if Charles had heard the door open or if he had felt the presence of another mind in close proximity.

Erik recognized the signs of fatigue on his face, pronounced lines around his eyes and a darkened hue underneath them. His face looked paler than usual as well.

Charles, looked a bit uncomfortable, eying him carefully. He cast aside the sheets that were covering him and slid out of the bed. He was wearing blue pajamas with a white steak near the seams and the collar. For a moment Erik had to resist the urge to snort. The nightwear was so…Charles. Thirty-five years old going on fifty, judging from his choice in clothes.

"I assume you have a reason for this intrusion." He crossed his hands in front of him, looking at the magnetokinetic, squarely in the eyes. His discomfort had disappeared, leaving him with an neutral expression.

"Don't play games with me Charles," Erik said, "you know I wasn't going to let yesterday's little discussion go just like that."

The telepath didn't answer. He rubbed his forehead, before turning his back to him. He took a glass from his nightstand and drank some water.

"What time is it?" He asked after a moment had passed.

Erik knew he was stalling, but he indulged him by answering. "A little after 9."

The only response he got was a nod, Charles attention had been diverted to the window. His expression thoughtful.

"Do you still intend to go with only those two as back up?" the magnetokinetic pressed.

"I do," Charles replied without hesitation, "I have faith in them."

"I don't!" it came out a little louder than Erik had intended, so he checked himself as he continued, "I don't trust that MacTaggert woman as far as I can throw her."

This time Charles turned his head to look at him disapprovingly, "My friend, she has done a lot to help us."

Erik's face darkened, "I just think this is a little too convenient, how she managed to locate the files and-"

"Erik, I trust her," the look in the telepath's eyes was serious and the magnetokinetic knew that he was getting nowhere with this. Charles could be stubborn when he chose to and he always defended Moira, which always vexed Erik. His dislike of the woman had been instantaneous, once he knew that she was working for the CIA. It was enough for him to distrust her and suspect hidden motives in anything she did. Charles did not however. But the fact that the man that could actually read her mind said she could be trusted didn't really do anything to reassure Erik.

"You trust too easily Charles. You are always willing to believe that people are noble and good."

"I prefer to give them a chance than outright turning them away," Charles once again brushed his forehead with his hand, closing his eyes for an instant. The next look he gave Erik had a hint of annoyance. It was a very uncharacteristic expression for him. The magnetokinetic realized, belatedly, that the telepath was a little strange this morning, not quite himself. He was less talkative, reserved and serious.

"No, I know. You just wait for them to stab you in the back hoping they will turn out better than you know they are."

Erik didn't know why he said that but he could feel anger bubble up inside him. Irrational anger.

"I am not blind Erik! I have been in the thoughts of humans and mutants alike. All of them have the potential for good."

"There isn't an awful lot of good in this world Charles," the magnetokinetic was aware that he had yelled that last phrase, driven by the still rising anger. He tried to contain it, but it didn't seem to work.

"The-." The telepath's answer was cut off as he winced.

Erik, who had been watching him closely didn't miss that.

He saw Charles rub his temples, eyes closed.

It made Erik frown, "Are you okay?"

All the anger had mysteriously disappeared. Only concern remained.

The telepath made a noncommittal gesture, "It's nothing, just a slight headache."

Once again Charles reached for the nightstand, opening a drawer. Erik saw him take out a pill and swallow it swiftly.

" Forgive me," the telepath said, honest regret in his expression, " I didn't want to start that argument again."

He moved closer to the magnetokinetic, "I would appreciate it if we stopped talking about our little trip to Langley. I understand your reservations, even if I do not share them."

Kneeling to Erik's level, he looked straight into his eyes, "It is something that has to be done and under any other circumstances I would have liked you by my side for this but I will just have to manage." His expression softened as he spoke.

It was true, he and Erik made an excellent team. They completed each other perfectly. That much had shown form the recruitment trip but also by the fight against Shaw. Not having the magnetokinetic with him would seem strange, but it could not be helped.

Erik felt uncertain, but strangely calm right now.

"We will be careful, I promise." The look the telepath gave him was a plea for trust and Erik could do nothing but grant it. It was the only thing he could do for him right now.

He sighed in resignation, nodding, "Just-. Don't hesitate Charles."

"Promise me that you will do what you have to get back here," his stare was intense but he had a suspicion his tone betrayed his worry, because Charles smiled. It was soft and less pronounced than his usual smiles but its appearance made Erik smirk, despite himself.

"I will."

For now Erik decided to be content with those two words.

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><p><em>Press the review button and tell me what you think!<em>


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing.

**A/N:** I am so sorry for the long wait but I am experiencing a huge writer's block the past few months and real life has been quite difficult to boot. I hope this is worth the wait. Feedback is treasured and any encouragement is desperately needed.

Now** beta-ed **by**MissBubbles**

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><p><strong>oOo<strong>

Charles had left that same afternoon.

His departure was met with some resistance from Alex, who had insisted on coming along. Everyone wanted to go, but like Erik, they understood why this time they couldn't. Accepting it was difficult. Hank had explained multiple times to Alex why it was necessary but Erik had the feeling he was trying to persuade himself rather than his fellow mutant.

Two days, Charles had said. Their excursion to DC would not last longer.

Erik had demanded that deadline, determined to act if they had not returned by then.

Waiting back at the mansion was a new experience for the magnetokinetic. Used to the one to take action, it was strange to be left behind like this. It was uncomfortable.

He could deal with the anxiety he felt before encountering a hostile party, he could kill without thinking about it, but he couldn't sit in safety and not know what was going on. It was the hardest thing in the world, to wait, wondering if everything had gone to plan or if anyone was hurt.

He was keenly aware of his foul mood. It had manifested even before Charles's departure and had only gotten worse. The young mutants shied away from him, leaving him to his thoughts. Solitude was something he knew well. It had been a constant in his life. He neither reveled nor shied away from it, it had simply been his reality for many long years. But his meeting with Charles had changed that.

Even if it had been just a few short months since that night, Erik had gotten used to the telepath's presence. He had bonded with another person and now the solitude seemed more hostile, colder and less familiar than it ever had. It was perhaps this feeling of loneliness that had driven him to spend most of his waking hours in Charles's office. Mentally he scoffed at the mere thought, unwilling to consciously acknowledge such a...romantic notion.

The room was more of a library than an office, books littered everywhere and papers stacked here and there. The windows overlooked the garden, which was empty this late in the day. Erik's eyes fell on the clock that decorated the mantelpiece.

They hadn't heard any news from the team, aside from a brief call that Charles had made to assure them they 'd reached DC safely and even then, they only exchanged a few words. During that conversation, Erik sensed that Charles was being invasive and the phone call had ended a little too fast for his comfort. It was like the telepath had been avoiding him again.

The thought didn't sit well with him.

They should have heard something by now. Raven had promised Hank to call as soon as everything was settled. It stood to reason then, that if they hadn't made contact then something must have gone wrong.

Erik clenched his fists.

Simultaneously he heard every metallic object in the room begin to vibrate, resonating with his anger. Closing his eyes, he reached out and felt every speck of metal, every molecule.

Ever since the submarine he had a new feel for his ability. The limits he had before no longer existed. He could shape and bend metal further than before, perceive it without looking at it. He knew Charles would not appreciate him destroying his little sanctum but this was strangely relaxing.

"Erik!" Hank McCoy's voice reached his ears, over the clattering. "Stop this!"

Reluctantly, the magnetokinetic relinquished his hold and restored everything to its original form before turning to glare at the animal-like mutant. To his credit McCoy looked unfazed.

"What do you want?"Erik barked at him.

"What are you doing?" the resident doctor questioned, crossing his arms in front of him, a hint of anger flashing in his eyes. The only answer he got however was an annoyed look.

"You're not the only one who's anxious," McCoy remarked, displeasure evident in his voice and a low grumble coloring it. "Just because you are worried about them, doesn't mean that you can bring down the house!"

The calmness Erik had gained briefly was seeping away. Irritation stirred within him once more. He turned away his gaze, completely uninterested in what Hank wanted to say to him.

"Look, I know it-" McCoy started before abruptly falling silent.

That gained Erik's attention. He turned to look at him, puzzled by the sudden silence and saw him crooking his head as if he could hear something.

"What is it?" the magnetokinetic asked, narrowing his eyes.

"They 're back!" the blue-furred mutant exclaimed, looking at Erik with a mixture of relief and joy.

"They 're at the door," Hank moved to grasp the handles of Erik's wheelchair but he was waved away.

"I can do this," Erik stated as he begun levitating the chair, moving it out of the room and down the hall, towards the stairs.

He'd only just made it downstairs, when the door opened and a tired looking Charles walked in. As always, the very first thing he noticed were the telepath's eyes. Usually bright and vibrant were now dimmed, ringed with dark circles. But Erik sensed there was something more to it than just sleep loss.

"Charles." The name escaped his lips almost unwittingly, concern lacing every syllable, but the telepath must have either heard him or felt his presence.

"Erik! " a smile formed on the telepath's lips as he saw him. But there was something about it that made the magnetokinetic feel like it was forced.

Charles then turned to Hank." I see you are taking good care of Erik," earning a timid smile from the younger man as Erik huffed indignantly but was ignored.

"Good evening professor ," Hank muttered coyly, as he usually was when someone praised him for anything.

" I'm sorry I didn't call," the telepath stepped inside, leaving the door open as he fumbled with his keys, averting his eyes, "We thought it best to depart as soon as we were finished."

"Where 's Raven?"Hank questioned, casting a glance behind the telepath.

"Oh, she's coming," Charles confirmed, his forehead furrowing slightly. He shook his head, as though he was trying to rid himself of an unwanted thought and he took a few steps further in before stopping abruptly.

"Are you okay?" Erik asked.

The telepath shook his head before bringing his hands up to rub his temples.

"You look a little unsteady," Hank remarked as Charles placed his hand against the wall.

"I'm fine," the telepath replied after a brief pause as he straightened his posture, "traveling doesn't sit well with me these days."

"You look exhausted Charles," Erik spoke in a firm tone. He was very glad to see that Charles was home in one piece, but also angry at his friend, who would push him to look after himself and not overdo it only to turn around and not heed his own advice.

"No, I think that-" Charles suddenly cried out as he clutched his head with his hands.

Charles doubled over in pain.

"Charles!" Erik exclaimed as he made to move forward, but Hank was quicker. He was at Charles side in moments.

"No, don't touch me!" Charles waved him away weakly.

"What's wrong?" Hank asked, anxiously studying the man in front of him, unsure of what was going on and what he should do.

His dilemma was solved when Charles let out another pained cry and crumpled to the floor. Hank's quick reflexes were the only thing that prevented him from hitting his head.

"Charles!" another exclamation was heard from the door as Raven rushed inside, kneeling down beside Hank, who was cradling Charles' body with care.

"I knew we shouldn't have traveled so soon after-" she mumbled as she knelt by his side.

"What's wrong with him?" Erik was glaring daggers, cursing his uselessness.

"It's probably just a migraine. He's exhausted." Hank declared, trying to sound reassuring. "I don't think fatigue is the cause of this," a soft, purring voice interrupted them.

Three pairs of eyes turned towards the door, where Emma Frost, clad in her usual white attire, was standing.

**oOoTBCoOo**

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><p><em>Review!<em>


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